Juror 8 Quotes

SOLOMON’S LAWS 1. Try not to piss off a cop unless you have a damn good reason . . . or a damn good lawyer. 2. The best way to hustle a case is to pretend you don’t want the work. 3. When arguing with a woman who is strong, intelligent, and forthright, consider using trickery, artifice, and deceit. 4. A prosecutor’s job is to build a brick wall around her case. A defense lawyer’s job is to tear down the wall, or at least to paint graffiti on the damn thing. 5. Listen to bus drivers, bailiffs, and twelve-year-old boys. Some days, they all know more than you do. 6. When the testimony is too damn good, when there are no contradictions and all the potholes are filled with smooth asphalt, chances are the witness is lying. 7. A shark who can’t bite is nothing but a mermaid. 8. When the woman you love is angry, it’s best to give her space, time, and copious quantities of wine. 9. Be confident, but not cocky. Smile, but don’t snicker. And no matter how desperate your case, never let the jurors see your fear. 10. Never sleep with a medical examiner, unless you’re dead. 11. If you can’t keep a promise to a loved one, you probably aren’t going to keep the loved one, either. 12. Life may be a marathon, but sometimes you have to sprint to save a life.

The bailiff tucked the jurors into their windowless room where they could surf for porn on their PDAs, and the judge turned to me. “Mr. Lassiter, Ah assume you got some legal mumbo jumbo for the record.” His Honor came from a family of gentleman farmers in Homestead by way of Kentucky, and his voice rippled with bourbon and branch water.

8th Juror: Did you ever see a woman who had to wear glasses and didn't want to because she thinks they spoil her looks? 6th Juror: My wife. Listen, I'm telling ya, as soon as we walk outa the house... 8th Juror: Maybe the district attorney didn't know either. 6th Juror: Yeah, that's what I was just gonna say. 3rd Juror. Ok. She had marks on her nose. I'm givin' ya that. From glasses. Right? She never worn 'em out of the house so people think'd she was gorgeous.

8th Juror: Did you ever see a woman who had to wear glasses and didn't want to because she thinks they spoil her looks? 6th Juror: My wife. Listen, I'm telling ya, as soon as we walk outa the house... 8th Juror: Maybe the district attorney didn't know either. 6th Juror: Yeah, that's what I was just gonna say. 3rd Juror: Ok. She had marks on her nose. I'm givin' ya that. From glasses. Right? She never worn 'em out of the house so people think'd she was gorgeous.

8th Juror: Did you ever see a woman who had to wear glasses and didn't want to because she thinks they spoil her looks? 6th Juror: My wife. Listen, I'm telling ya, as soon as we walk outa the house... 8th Juror: Maybe the district attorney didn't know either. 6th Juror: Yeah, that's what I was just gonna say. 3rd Juror: Ok. She had marks on her nose. I'm givin' ya that. From glasses. Right? She never worn 'em out of the house so people'd think she was gorgeous.