“
First, let no one rule your mind or body. Take special care that your thoughts remain unfettered... . Give men your ear, but not your heart. Show respect for those in power, but don't follow them blindly. Judge with logic and reason, but comment not. Consider none your superior whatever their rank or station in life. Treat all fairly, or they will seek revenge. Be careful with your money. Hold fast to your beliefs and others will listen.
”
”
Christopher Paolini (Eragon (The Inheritance Cycle, #1))
“
The struggles we endure today will be the ‘good old days’ we laugh about tomorrow.
”
”
Aaron Lauritsen (100 Days Drive: The Great North American Road Trip)
“
When they judge you, yawn.
When they misunderstand you, smile.
When they underestimate you, laugh.
When they condemn you, ignore.
When they envy you, rejoice.
When they oppose you, prevail.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
It's in those quiet little towns, at the edge of the world, that you will find the salt of the earth people who make you feel right at home.
”
”
Aaron Lauritsen (100 Days Drive: The Great North American Road Trip)
“
...don’t judge your future based on others’ mistakes.
”
”
Rachel Vincent (My Soul to Take (Soul Screamers, #1))
“
Those who achieve the extraordinary are usually the most ordinary because they have nothing to prove to anybody. Be Humble.
”
”
Aaron Lauritsen (100 Days Drive: The Great North American Road Trip)
“
be a good listener, don't judge and don't put boundaries on someone else's grief.
”
”
Jodi Picoult (The Storyteller)
“
There's more to a person than flesh. Judge others by the sum of their soul and you'll see that beauty is a force of light that radiates from the inside out.
”
”
Aaron Lauritsen
“
Life is too complicated and expansive to be judged solely by the career you have. You could be unhappy doing something you liked, just as it was possible to do what you didn't like but derive happiness from something entirely different. Life is mysterious and complex. Work plays an important role in life, but it isn't solely responsible for our happiness or misery
”
”
Hwang Bo-Reum (Welcome to the Hyunam-Dong Bookshop)
“
A person that judges others will inevitably judge themselves harshly. It is only when one stops judging others that, that one can truly appreciate the beauty within.
”
”
Ando Oomae
“
Start the process of becoming more curious by being less judging and more understanding.
”
”
Pooja Agnihotri (17 Reasons Why Businesses Fail :Unscrew Yourself From Business Failure)
“
Regard mistakes as teachers, not judges!
”
”
Tae Yun Kim (The Silent Master: Awakening the Power Within)
“
False has many wings. Do not judge anything by its popularity.
”
”
Amit Ray (Meditation: Insights and Inspirations)
“
Judge not lest ye be judged yourself.
”
”
Metallica
“
Judge not, lest you be judged.
”
”
Anonymous (The Holy Bible: King James Version)
“
Once you show someone your true colors it is impossible to paint over them.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference. Don't allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It's there for your convenience, not the callers. Don't be afraid to go out on a limb. That's where the fruit is. Don't burn bridges. You'll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river. Don't forget, a person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated. Don't major in minor things. Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Helen Keller, Leonardo Da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein. Don't spread yourself too thin. Learn to say no politely and quickly. Don't use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved. Don't waste time grieving over past mistakes Learn from them and move on. Every person needs to have their moment in the sun, when they raise their arms in victory, knowing that on this day, at his hour, they were at their very best. Get your priorities straight. No one ever said on his death bed, 'Gee, if I'd only spent more time at the office'. Give people a second chance, but not a third. Judge your success by the degree that you're enjoying peace, health and love. Learn to listen. Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly. Leave everything a little better than you found it. Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life and death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems. Never cut what can be untied. Never overestimate your power to change others. Never underestimate your power to change yourself. Remember that overnight success usually takes about fifteen years. Remember that winners do what losers don't want to do. Seek opportunity, not security. A boat in harbor is safe, but in time its bottom will rot out. Spend less time worrying who's right, more time deciding what's right. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life. Success is getting what you want. Happiness is liking what you get. The importance of winning is not what we get from it, but what we become because of it. When facing a difficult task, act as though it's impossible to fail.
”
”
Jackson H. Brown Jr.
“
At the current state of human evolution, we judge others based on their appearance. Until we learn to love all beings deep down, we will continue hating certain beings. There is only love in oneness.
”
”
Todd Perelmuter (Spiritual Words to Live by : 81 Daily Wisdoms and Meditations to Transform Your Life)
“
Today I acknowledge that I am not in position to judge what mistakes anyone is making or what lessons anyone needs to learn. I don’t know how far someone has come or when that person will have a breakthrough, I simply don’t know what other people should be doing. But when I think I do know, I clearly am not doing what I should be doing, which is taking responsibility for my own life.
”
”
Hugh Prather
“
Try to be "good", you'll be judged. Try to be yourself, you'll be criticized. Therefore, choose the second option. Evil uses the "nice good people" as puppets. It appears dressed as a poor guy, telling them that he needs help...When these people realize they have been used, it is already too late.
”
”
Paulo Coelho
“
If you want to know a man, dig in his firepit...Basically, it meant that you could judge a lot about a man's life by what he thew away - or by what he was willing to burn in order to stay warm.
”
”
Brandon Sanderson (Shadows of Self (Mistborn, #5))
“
Not everyone with a problem needs you to solve it. Sometimes all a person needs is to feel like they've been heard. Listening without judging can be more effective than injecting your opinions or trying to solve a problem that doesn't have an easy answer.
”
”
Zero Dean (Lessons Learned from The Path Less Traveled Volume 1: Get motivated & overcome obstacles with courage, confidence & self-discipline)
“
We tend to be judged because of our actions.
”
”
Roxy Writer
“
Support is the number one thing when it comes to fighting a mental illness. And the ones who have walked in the same shoes as you are the very best support system. There is no stigma in this group. There is no judging. We aren’t here to judge. We are here to understand and to let you know you aren’t alone in whatever battle you are facing. And that is why we started this group called You Matter.
”
”
Emma Thomas (Live for Me)
“
When a doctor makes a mistake, a person goes six feet below the ground. When a judge makes a mistake, a person is hung six feet above the ground. But when a teacher makes a mistake, the entire batch of students is destroyed. Don’t ever look down on teachers.
”
”
Sudha Murty (The Day I Stopped Drinking Milk: Life Lessons from Here and There)
“
It is easy to be carried away with ruminating about the past and worrying about the future. We waste precious seconds, minutes, hours doing this every single day. When we stop judging our experiences, we become less reactive and better able to tolerate difficulty.
”
”
Keisha Blair (Holistic Wealth: 32 Life Lessons to Help You Find Purpose, Prosperity, and Happiness)
“
Everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its able to climb a tree it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.
”
”
Lynda Mullaly Hunt (Fish in a Tree)
“
when you pick a flower, you become so besotted in its beauty; you dare not judge how it became that way, let it be the same lesson for humans; Spread your light, not your pain.
”
”
Nikki Rowe
“
Learn the truth...never assume.
Understand the plight...never judge.
Put yourself in someone's shoes...never hurt.
Think before you act, reason before you react.
”
”
Kemi Sogunle (Beyond the Pain by Kemi Sogunle)
“
Enlightenment lacks any form of judgment.
”
”
Kamand Kojouri
“
♫ I learned a lesson today: never judge a person by the way they act, nor how they dress, or the way they have their disabilities. Because everyone on Earth suffers the same hell, whether in love or hate, life or death.
”
”
Nandanie Phalgoo (Bodiless (Lost Souls, #1))
“
Only to the degree that people have what they need, that they are healthy and unafraid, that their lives are varied, interesting, meaningful, productive, joyous, can we begin to judge, or even guess, their nature. Few people, adults or children, now live such lives.
”
”
John C. Holt (Instead of Education: Ways to Help People Do Things Better)
“
Hell, you’re the only man I’ve ever met that I would stand in front of a judge and say I’m gay for.
”
”
Kaje Harper (Breaking Cover (Life Lessons, #2))
“
The more mistakes I make, the less I judge other people's mistakes
”
”
Bayan Bahi
“
Measure yourself by your best moments, not by your worst. We are too prone to judge ourselves by our moments of despondency and depression.
”
”
Robert Johnson
“
Let them judge you, but remain virtuous.
Let them criticize you, but remain wise.
Let them misunderstand you, but remain kind.
Let them hate you, but remain exceptional.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
There is so much I could say about myself, but I wish you know only this; at times I may be bitter, at times I may be sweet; do not judge me on one character or the other. I have more facets than a jewel, I ask that you understand all of me before you judge me. No one side of my personality is bigger than another, just as no one emotion claims me all the time.
”
”
K.K. Cook
“
Before you look for dirt in people, look for treasure.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
While you were out JUDGING others, you left your closet door open...and guess what fell out!....Ooops
”
”
Karen Gibbs (A Gallery of Scrapbook Creations)
“
I don't appreciate people when they judge someone with their appearance but not their feelings. It feels like they want to rule that person for rest of their life.
”
”
Kiran Arshad
“
Judge Fowler imparted to the wedding pair, “Love, knocks ever so lightly and enters our hearts in a whisper. It can sometimes be heard loudest in a glance.
”
”
Kevin Moccia (The Beagle and the Hare)
“
Be careful before you judge. More importantly, watch out for the judgements you place upon yourself.
”
”
Brittany Burgunder
“
Don't judge people on their Religion, Family Or Country they live ... Judge People On Their Nature..!!
”
”
Sagar Pandit
“
The morning sun has a lesson to teach us—without judging, love everyone as he does.
”
”
Debasish Mridha
“
Never judge the life of another man.
You never know his struggles.
”
”
Lailah Gifty Akita (Think Great: Be Great! (Beautiful Quotes, #1))
“
When the ego is in the driver’s seat, we judge. When our spirit, our authentic self, is in control, we practice listening (without judging), compassion, and love.
”
”
Sheila Burke
“
In time we all search for something to ease the confusion. Some find hope in a bottle and some find hope in a heart,
we are not to judge,
for we have never walked their path.
”
”
Nikki Rowe
“
If our eyes could see everything, every man would see his own faults.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
The more mistakes I make, the least I judge other people's mistakes
”
”
Bayan Bahi
“
Judge Fowler knew Clara was not long for the world--it was the manner of how she seized everything that gave her away. Clara was vibrant in youth, beautiful and radiant upon her wedding night beyond compare! But death cannot be masked from those who can see the outline of its features scribbled in the margins of another’s being.
”
”
Kevin Moccia (The Beagle and the Hare)
“
Dont act like you are walking around with a Tshirt that says "I give Up!" on the front and on the back saying "I never started trying!"
People can bring you down, situations happen, YOU can feel like Life is the shittiest thing to deal with. BLAH BLAH BLAH..
If you're walking through Hell, keep going! Everyday there's a new challenge. Face it! Deal with it! Move on! To every problem there is a solution or a way around it.. Stop being a sour mongral and think life owes you something..
No one will do anything for you these days. Start fighting. Get rid of ALL the shit people in your Life. Grow some balls of steel and work progressively through everything. Step by Step or what ever mad method you have to get you back in line again.
Who cares, if people don't like you, BURN that mother of a bridge down. It was never meant to be.. Build New ones! Many roads to cross and new paths on life to Explore..
It starts with YOU.. And if people want to judge you, tell them to F/O and look in the mirror. Time for a new game.. It's called "Take over the World" WHOOOP WHOOOP!!
”
”
Timothy Padayachee
“
If others are judgmental and do not appreciate your life's work, don't be dejected. Try to see the incapability of others who are unable to understand the things you understand, and appreciate the capability of seeing something which is not visible to others.
”
”
Ashish Mandlik
“
There’s no magic ruler by which we’re all judged and weighed, not in this life. If you wait for someone to tell you it’s time to grow up, you’ll wait forever. Some people, quite happily, do just that. They don’t do anything until they’re forced to by circumstance
”
”
Heidi Cullinan (Love Lessons (Love Lessons, #1))
“
It’s not easy,” Ruben said, sitting up on the couch and gesturing to his own marred face. “Wearing your mistakes and regrets on the outside where others can judge them. But, man, the problem is not that others judge you harshly, it’s that you believe what they say.
”
”
Mia Sheridan (The Wish Collector)
“
Justice is blind, until a judge gives it eyes.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
We need to judge less and understand more.
”
”
Mitta Xinindlu
“
Don't waste time defending your intentions. History will judge you by the outcomes of your actions
”
”
Savania China
“
We tend to be our own worst critic. Judging ourselves far more harshly than anyone else would. Don't fall into the trap of believing the lies you think about yourself.
”
”
Jillian West (Left in Ruins (Ruined Records #1))
“
We Judge Others By Their Actions, Not Intentions. But We Expect Them To Judge Us By Our Intentions, Not Actions”.
”
”
Vraja Bihari Das (Venugopal Acharya)
“
Life seems to be like a stock market...
Where relationships are traded...
Can't judge when the value of a relationship will go high or low...!
”
”
Kankane Rakhi Surendra
“
We have time for everything:
to sleep, to run from one place to another,
to regret having mistaken and to mistake again,
to judge the others and to forgive
ourselves
we have time for reading and writing,
for making corrections to our texts, to regret ever having
written
we have time to make plans and time not to respect them,
we have time for ambitions and sicknesses,
time to blame the destiny and the details,
we have time to watch the clouds, advertisements or
some ordinary accident,
we have time to chase our wonders away
and to postpone the answers,
we have time to break a dream to pieces and then
to reinvent it,
we have time to make friends, to lose friends,
we have time to receive lessons and forget them afterwards,
we have time to receive gifts and not to understand them.
We have time for them all.
There is no time for just a bit of tenderness.
When we are aware about to do this we die.
I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you;
All you can do is to be a loved person.
the rest … depends on the others.
I’ve learned that as much as I care
others might not care.
I’ve learned that it takes years to earn trust
and just a few seconds to lose it.
I’ve learned that it does not matter WHAT you have in your life
but WHO you have.
I’ve learned that your charm is useful for about 15 minutes
Afterwards, you should better know something.
I’ve learned that no matter how you cut it,
everything has two sides!
I’ve learned that you should separate from your loved ones with warm words
It might be the last time you see them!
I’ve learned that you can still continue for a long time after saying you cannot continue anymore
I’ve learned that heroes are those who do what they have to do,
when they have to do it,
regardless the consequences
I’ve learned that there are people who love
But do not know how to show it !
I’ve learned that when I am upset I have the RIGHT to be upset
But not the right to be bad!
I’ve learned that real friendship continues to exist despite the distance
And this is true also for REAL LOVE !!!
I’ve learned that if someone does not love you like you want them to
It does not mean that they do not love you with all their heart.
I’ve learned that no matter how good of a friend someone is for you
that person will hurt you every now and then
and that you have to forgive him.
I’ve learned that it is not enough to be forgiven by others
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I’ve learned that no matter how much you suffer,
The world will not stop for your pain.
I’ve learned that the past and the circumstances might have an influence on your personality
But that YOU are responsible for what you become !!!
I’ve learned that if two people have an argument it does not mean that they do not love each other
I’ve learned that sometimes you have to put on the first place the person, not the facts
I’ve learned that two people can look at the same thing
and can see something totally different
I’ve learned that regardless the consequences
those WHO ARE HONEST with themselves go further in life.
I’ve learned that life can be changed in a few hours
by people who do not even know you.
I’ve learned that even when you think there is nothing more you can give
when a friend calls you, you will find the strength to help him.
I’ve learned that writing just like talking can ease the pains of the soul !
I’ve learned that those whom you love the most
are taken away from you too soon …
I’ve learned that it is too difficult to realise where to draw the line between being friendly, not hurting people and supporting your oppinions.
I’ve learned to love
to be loved.
”
”
Octavian Paler
“
Never make a promise you can't keep.
Never look down on a person you can't help.
Never solicit a question you can't answer.
Never judge a person you don't understand.
Never condemn a person you don't know.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
We do not wish to judge anyone nor wish to be judged
in return. Meaning, we must dwell on the neutral side, in order to fully understand ourselves and those who are constantly causing us trouble in our daily lives.
”
”
Mwanandeke Kindembo (Treatise Upon The Misconceptions of Narcissism)
“
The lesson I had learned for my pain turned out to be modest and simple: the best intentions can lead to the worst results. I had believed in the left because of the good it had promised. Now I learned to judge it by the evil it had done.
”
”
David Horowitz (The Black Book of the American Left: The Collected Conservative Writings of David Horowitz (My Life and Times 1))
“
Judgment closes the doors of understanding, while analysis opens the windows of insight. The former dismisses, condemns, and separates, while the latter explores, comprehends, and connects. Let us choose the path of analysis over judgment, for it is through discernment and empathy that we foster true understanding and bridge the gaps between us
”
”
Erick "The Black Sheep" G
“
When the ego is in the driver’s seat, we judge. When our spirit, our authentic self, is in control, we practice listening (without judging), compassion, and love
”
”
Sheila M. Burke (Enriched Heart: The Tao of Balancing Your Big, Beautiful, Badass Soul)
“
Life is short,
Assume less, ask more.
Breath is short,
Chase less, cherish more.
”
”
Abhijit Naskar (Esperanza Impossible: 100 Sonnets of Ethics, Engineering & Existence)
“
Those who matter do not judge you; those who do should not matter to you.
”
”
Rohit Dharupta (Disorder of the World)
“
Because the fact is, when you’re discussing passion, you can’t only judge someone on their success, but on their failures as well.
”
”
George Ilian (Warren Buffett: The Life and Business Lessons of Warren Buffett)
“
Never judge the life of another man.
”
”
Lailah Gifty Akita (Think Great: Be Great! (Beautiful Quotes, #1))
“
God hides treasure in dirt, so that only those humble enough to dig through it find it.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
Reward those who help you. Forget those who use you. Ignore those who judge you. Forgive those who wrong you.
”
”
Matshona Dhliwayo
“
Don't judge people by their religious, cultural, or professional background. Judge if you must, by their behavior with other people.
”
”
Abhijit Naskar
“
True listening demands we postpone judgment. When we listen like this, hearing without judging, says Schopenhauer, we “feel positively happy.
”
”
Eric Weiner (The Socrates Express: In Search of Life Lessons from Dead Philosophers)
“
As Voltaire said, the best judge of a person is not the answers they give but the questions they ask.
”
”
Eric Weiner (The Socrates Express: In Search of Life Lessons from Dead Philosophers)
“
We look at our challenges—at our lessons—as things we master in order to achieve our goals. But the most important lessons in life sometimes have to do with what happens when we fail. How do we know when to surrender and walk away? How do we judge our own part in our failures? Is it something to learn from, or just bad luck? And how do we pick ourselves up again afterward?
- Queen Breha Organa of Alderaan
”
”
Claudia Gray (Leia: Princess of Alderaan (Journey to Star Wars: The Last Jedi, #3))
“
We never love a person after judging them because that's not love then, But today's life lesson is to judge a person before falling in love with that person, It's hard to trust anyone in this cruel world where all are determined to hurt you by any mean.
”
”
Debolina Bhawal
“
Just as we judge death as a failure, we feel relationships have failed if they do not last. The same way we say the only complete and successful life is one that lasted ninety-five years, we feel that the only successful and complete relationships are those that last forever.
The reality is that relationships are successful and heal us even if they only last six months. They do what they are supposed to. When they are no longer needed, they are complete and successful.
Unfortunately, we don't always know that relationships are complete and successful.
”
”
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (Life Lessons: Two Experts on Death and Dying Teach Us About the Mysteries of Life and Living)
“
I strongly believe that teachers need to tell students about great lives and make children understand their history and heritage. It is only through this that a love for the country is born that is based on knowledge and understanding. This is how children not only know what is good and what is evil but also learn to judge for themselves the distinction between the two. They then know the best way to behave in many situations. These lessons can form the moral core around which our personalities are formed—something that no one can take away from us however old we get.
”
”
A.P.J. Abdul Kalam (My Life: An Illustrated Biography: An Illustrated Autobiography)
“
My lessons from my mother’s life are many, but one that stings the most and the one I want to imbue in my heart is to not judge people negatively by how they act, even if they look normal, or have been normal in your past, because you never know what they have to fight inside — something they never chose to have.
The answer to Dustin walking was not willpower. He was not born to walk, and while trying made us better people, more practice wasn’t the answer — compassion was. The answer to the feeling that I was losing my mother slowly over the years was not to try to motivate her into a new perspective to magically fix all the problems — it was love.
”
”
Darcy Leech (From My Mother)
“
Letting go of control allowed me to release the undirected rage I was carrying around. I’m still angry—have you seen the world?—but not at myself, nor at passing strangers whose lives I silently judge as better or easier than mine. I’m not even mad that I’m sick. Rather, the powerful, vibrating fury in my belly is directed at the politicians
”
”
Tessa Miller (What Doesn't Kill You: A Life with Chronic Illness - Lessons from a Body in Revolt)
“
Every single parent is doing the best he or she can. Never judge an angry parent who screams at their child, or judge any parent for any behavior. You don’t know them, you don’t know their story, you don’t know about their silent struggles or childhood traumas, you don’t know
how hard it is for them, you don’t know anything about anyone. you don’t know what you would do if you were in their shoes. Viktor Frankl said, “No man should judge unless he asks himself in absolute honesty whether, in a similar situation, he might not have done the same.” We all do the best we can. It is hands down the hardest never-ending but fulfilling job
on this planet. It isn’t easy to create, shape, and raise another human being when most of us aren’t raised, shaped, or grown up. So, one of the biggest lessons I also learned is to stay in my lane, don’t judge any parent, to never say never, and be compassionate toward myself and others. Of course, if you see a parent spanking a child, you have to stop them, if you know a child is in an unsafe environment, you have to change it and help any child in need, but try as hard as you can not to judge them and just let
go of your thoughts when they arise. At the end of the day, we all do the best we can with the tools we have.
”
”
Ani Rich (A Missing Drop: Free Your Mind From Conditioning And Reconnect To Your Truest Self)
“
Things I learned from a man called “The Nazarene”
1- Being poor does not equal being miserable.
2- People will judge you, but their judgment should not define who you are.
3- Going against what others hold as true is not necessarily a bad thing.
4- Everyone is sacred.
5- Life is sometimes a lonely and dry place, like desert, but those times are there to help us meditate on what is truly important in our lives.
6- Complaining or getting angry because there is a storm in our lives solves nothing; embrace the storm and keep calm.
7- Treasure and protect the children of the world, they hold the key of what is pure and innocent; they are the way to freedom.
8- We are free to be who we want to be, it is our choice to be slaves or kings.
9- Fear nothing.
10- The person you don’t like is also your neighbor.
11- The words following “I AM” define who we are, we must choose wisely.
”
”
Martin Suarez
“
They did not awaken quickly, nor fling about nor shock their systems with any sudden movement. No, they arose from slumber as gently as a soap bubble floats out from its pipe. Down into the gulch they trudged, still only half awake. Gradually their wills coagulated. They built a fire and boiled some tea and drank it from the fruit jars, and at last they settled in the sun on the front porch. The flaming flies made halos about their heads. Life took shape about them, the shape of yesterday and of tomorrow. Discussion began slowly, for each man treasured the little sleep he still possessed. From this time until well after noon, intellectual comradeship came into being. Then roofs were lifted, houses peered into, motives inspected, adventures recounted. Ordinarily their thoughts went first to Cornelia Ruiz, for it was a rare day and night during which Cornelia had not some curious and interesting adventure. And it was an unusual adventure from which no moral lesson could be drawn. The sun glistened in the pine needles. The earth smelled dry and good. The rose of Castile perfumed the world with its flowers. This was one of the best of times for the friends of Danny. The struggle for existence was remote. They sat in judgment on their fellows, judging not for morals, but for interest. Anyone having a good thing to tell saved it for recounting at this time. The big brown butterflies came to the rose and sat on the flowers and waved their wings slowly, as though they pumped honey out by wing power.
”
”
John Steinbeck (Tortilla Flat)
“
Ultimately, this story teaches us that things simply happen in life. They are not good or bad—they just are. They all serve the greater purpose of providing life lessons, but if we are too quick to judge them as good or bad based on initial impressions, we run the risk of losing sight of the real lessons. So next time something “bad” happens to you and makes you feel upset, remember: Sai Ong loses horse. Who knows if it isn’t a blessing? Chapter 9 The Wolves What Is the Best Way to Handle Negative People?
”
”
Derek Lin (The Tao of Daily Life: The Mysteries of the Orient Revealed The Joys of Inner Harmony Found The Path to Enlightenment Illuminated)
“
It is often the case that people of noble character and great mental gifts betray a strange lack of worldly wisdom and a deficiency in the knowledge of men, more especially when they are young; with the result that it is easy to deceive or mislead them; and that, on the other hand, natures of the commoner sort are more ready and successful in making their way in the world.
The reason of this is that, when a man has little or no experience, he must judge by his own antecedent notions; and in matters demanding judgment, an antecedent notion is never on the same level as experience. For, with the commoner sort of people, an antecedent notion means just their own selfish point of view. This is not the case with those whose mind and character are above the ordinary; for it is precisely in this respect — their unselfishness — that they differ from the rest of mankind; and as they judge other people's thoughts and actions by their own high standard, the result does not always tally with their calculation.
But if, in the end, a man of noble character comes to see, as the effect of his own experience, or by the lessons he learns from others, what it is that may be expected of men in general, — namely, that five-sixths of them are morally and intellectually so constituted that, if circumstances do not place you in relation with them, you had better get out of their way and keep as far as possible from having anything to do with them, — still, he will scarcely ever attain an adequate notion of their wretchedly mean and shabby nature: all his life long he will have to be extending and adding to the inferior estimate he forms of them; and in the meantime he will commit a great many mistakes and do himself harm.
”
”
Arthur Schopenhauer (Counsels and Maxims (The Essays of Arthur Schopenhauer))
“
People judge the unknown with their knowledge of the known.
.
Fear is the most prized illusion that we create for ourselves.
.
Human beings are designed in a way that they always live with one half of their self in the past and the other half in the present.
.
Love doesn't always happen to strengthen our beliefs. Sometimes it happens to destroy all our previous beliefs and faith and gives us a chance to re-look at our own conclusions.
.
We all are designed to remember things. So, if you try to forget, you will suffer. Accept and you shall shine like never before. The greatest lesson love can give you is how to live a complete life by accepting its incomplete ways. If you can’t hope in love, you can’t live.
.
Accidents happen Mini but that doesn't mean you stop travelling.
.
Sometimes we confuse need and necessity, I guess. Necessity is common to all but need is person-specific.
.
What to do when you are in love with the journey but at the same time scared of the undesirable destination which you know is going to arrive sooner or later?
.
Sometimes we lie not to cover the truth but to cover that side of us which the truth may strip to bareness.
”
”
Novoneel Chakraborty (Marry Me, Stranger)
“
What I’ve learned from these long voyages of ours is that, in the end, we all strive for our own good. It does not matter what race we are, who we are… We have that one thing in common – the wish to live this life the best way possible. Hence, our definitions of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ always remain subjective – no matter how many perspectives we consider, no matter how objective we try to be, we still judge according to our own beliefs, principles, and opinions – things that we develop throughout our entire life. In truth, nothing is either ‘good’ or ‘bad’ but is both good and bad, all at the same time, depending on the perspective and the relation with other matters. This world is much more versatile than we thought it was. The only universal truth is the energy of life and love – the unending circle, and the undying emotion – interconnected for eternity. Life bears love, and love bears life. Hence, I believe that whatever era may come, major concepts shall never change. We should pave our way and live to our content, staying harmonious with ourselves, because in the end, we shall never know what is right and what is wrong. We interrelate just like the tiniest substances – molecules, atoms, etc. – and the biggest substances – planets, galaxies, universes… During these interrelations, there shall be unions as well as collisions, destructions as well as creations… As long as we live, there shall be both oppositions and friendships. There shall be peace, there shall be war, and then peace again. This shall not change. Hope will motivate us, mind shall guide us, love shall rejoice us, death shall sadden us, but life will go on. Life is always moving and ardent, never to stop or pause. This is the only universal truth that exists in this world – the energy of ardour and life.
”
”
Tamuna Tsertsvadze (Galaxy Pirates)
“
Don’t Lose Track I don’t live in your heart or in your mind, so I cannot judge your intentions or your beliefs. Although your actions may give me a good impression of who you really are as a person, and although I may learn some lessons from your mistakes, I have no right to openly judge you because my purpose in life is not to criticize other people’s lives but to be respectful and considerate of them along my own path to reach my end vision in life. My path may cross with yours, and I may believe that you are on the wrong track, but if I lose track of my path because I’m too busy judging yours, I will waste my time and yours. Who I am and what I believe in are mine to keep, and who you are and what you believe in are yours to keep. They are yours to strengthen, change, or even keep the same. As long as we can be true to ourselves, stay away from hypocrisy, and be respectful toward one another, we will be happy along our paths to reach our dreams. One day, you will realize that there is no one more worthy of your attention or your criticism than yourself. Imagine putting all of the effort and energy you spend criticizing others and exposing their mistakes toward bettering yourself. Wouldn’t you be much more content and happy?
”
”
Najwa Zebian (Mind Platter)
“
Primer of Love [Lesson 19]
Be strong, believe in freedom and in God,
love yourself, understand your sexuality,
have a sense of humor, masturbate,
don't judge people by their religion,
color or sexual habits, love life and your family.
~ Madonna
Lesson 19) Love yourself with all your flaws then
you can learn to love another deeply.
You cannot love another unless you love yourself first. But, while you're prepping yourself for the greatest adventure, don't fall too in love with yourself. Narcissism can often lead to a solipsistic self-absorption which only admits others as entertainment, not as agents of transformation.
”
”
Beryl Dov
“
But I’ve come to realize that our short time here on earth isn’t about what we accomplish but about what sort of people we become. I’m at the end of my life now. When I look back on the work I’ve done, I see that God was using it to teach me to care about someone besides myself. He's been working compassion in your mother too, and also with you judging by the risk you just took for your friends. God also uses our circumstances to teach us to rely on Him; that was the first lesson I ever learned when I helped deliver those slaves in our wagon. That's why my mother brought me with her in the first place. She told me that we would grow stronger every time our faith is tested; that's how we learn to trust God.
”
”
Lynn Austin (Though Waters Roar)
“
But in hallowing King we have hollowed him. From Montgomery to Chicago, along those streets named Martin Luther King Jr. Drive and Martin Luther King Jr. Avenue and Martin Luther King Jr. Highway and Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard, poverty and segregation rates remain much higher than the local and national averages, according to recent studies. In those schools named for King, and in almost every school in America, King's life and lessons and often smooth and polished beyond recognition. Young people hear his dream of brotherhood and his wish for children to be judged by the content of their character, but not his cry for an end to the triple evils of materialism, militarism, and racism. [...] Our simplified celebration of King comes at a cost. It saps the strength of his philosophical and intellectual contributions. It undercuts his power to inspire change.
”
”
Jonathan Eig (King: A Life)
“
Holy Suffering
"Choosing to suffer means that there must be something wrong with you, but choosing God's will - even if it means you will suffer - is something very different...and no saint should ever dare to interfere with the lesson of suffering being taught in another saint's life...the people used to strengthen us are never those who sympathize with us; in fact, we are hindered by those who give us sympathy, because sympathy only serves to weaken us...Jesus said self-pity was of the devil (Matthew 16:21-23: 'Get thee behind me, Satan!')
Look at God's incredible waste of His saints, according to the world's judgement. God seems to plant His saints in the most useless places...Jesus never measured His life by how or where He was of greatest use. God places His saints where they will bring the most glory to Him and we are totally incapable of judging where that may be.
”
”
Oswald Chambers
“
Yesterday while I was on the side of the mat next to some wrestlers who were warming up for their next match, I found myself standing side by side next to an extraordinary wrestler.
He was warming up and he had that look of desperation on his face that wrestlers get when their match is about to start and their coach is across the gym coaching on another mat in a match that is already in progress.
“Hey do you have a coach.” I asked him.
“He's not here right now.” He quietly answered me ready to take on the task of wrestling his opponent alone.
“Would you mind if I coached you?”
His face tilted up at me with a slight smile and said. “That would be great.”
Through the sounds of whistles and yelling fans I heard him ask me what my name was.
“My name is John.” I replied.
“Hi John, I am Nishan” he said while extending his hand for a handshake.
He paused for a second and then he said to me: “John I am going to lose this match”.
He said that as if he was preparing me so I wouldn’t get hurt when my coaching skills didn’t work magic with him today.
I just said, “Nishan - No score of a match will ever make you a winner. You are already a winner by stepping onto that mat.”
With that he just smiled and slowly ran on to the mat, ready for battle, but half knowing what the probable outcome would be.
When you first see Nishan you will notice that his legs are frail - very frail. So frail that they have to be supported by custom made, form fitted braces to help support and straighten his limbs.
Braces that I recognize all to well.
Some would say Nishan has a handicap.
I say that he has a gift.
To me the word handicap is a word that describes what one “can’t do”.
That doesn’t describe Nishan.
Nishan is doing.
The word “gift” is a word that describes something of value that you give to others.
And without knowing it, Nishan is giving us all a gift.
I believe Nishan’s gift is inspiration.
The ability to look the odds in the eye and say “You don’t pertain to me.”
The ability to keep moving forward.
Perseverance.
A “Whatever it takes” attitude.
As he predicted, the outcome of his match wasn’t great.
That is, if the only thing you judge a wrestling match by is the actual score. Nishan tried as hard as he could, but he couldn’t overcome the twenty-six pound weight difference that he was giving up to his opponent on this day in order to compete. You see, Nishan weighs only 80 pounds and the lowest weight class in this tournament was 106. Nishan knew he was spotting his opponent 26 pounds going into every match on this day. He wrestled anyway.
I never did get the chance to ask him why he wrestles, but if I had to guess I would say, after watching him all day long, that Nishan wrestles for the same reasons that we all wrestle for.
We wrestle to feel alive, to push ourselves to our mental, physical and emotional limits - levels we never knew we could reach.
We wrestle to learn to use 100% of what we have today in hopes that our maximum today will be our minimum tomorrow. We wrestle to measure where we started from, to know where we are now, and to plan on getting where we want to be in the future. We wrestle to look the seemingly insurmountable opponent right in the eye and say, “Bring it on. - I can take whatever you can dish out.”
Sometimes life is your opponent and just showing up is a victory.
You don't need to score more points than your opponent in order to accomplish that.
No Nishan didn’t score more points than any of his opponents on this day, that would have been nice, but I don’t believe that was the most important thing to Nishan. Without knowing for sure - the most important thing to him on this day was to walk with pride like a wrestler up to a thirty two foot circle, have all eyes from the crowd on him, to watch him compete one on one against his opponent - giving it all that he had. That is what competition is all about. Most of the times in wrestlin
”
”
JohnA Passaro
“
My neck was messed up and I was about to get my ass kicked by my archnemesis and my ex. It couldn’t get much worse than that. But we were at the worlds, in this huge arena with everyone cheering. We had made it this far, and I was proud of how hard we worked. “You know, let’s just have an awesome time.”
And that was it: I took all this pressure off us. We danced our butts off and I forgot to worry about my neck or Rachael and Evgeni. I was just living in the moment, pulling my energy from the roaring crowd. They were going crazy for their Czech Republic representatives, but I didn’t care. I used their energy to fuel mine. There was such a joy and freedom to my dancing that day. I gave myself permission to just let it all go, and my dancing felt pure and unbridled. We got to the finale--I somehow hung in there--and my neck was so tight and throbbing, I could barely turn it to see where Aneta was. It was kind of like dancing with blinders on; I had tunnel vision. Yet on we danced, till the judges called time. I had made it; we had made it. All I wanted now was a huge ice pack and a nap.
They read the names out from sixth place to first. We were standing backstage behind a huge curtain, and Rachael and Evgeni were right next to us. Swell.
”
”
Derek Hough (Taking the Lead: Lessons from a Life in Motion)
“
Being an outsider, being picked on, was very painful, but in hindsight it made me a better judge of people. In my life I would spend a lot of time assessing threats, judging tone of voice, and figuring out the shifting dynamic in a hallway or locker room crowd. Surviving a bully requires constant learning and adaptation. Which is why bullies are so powerful, because it’s so much easier to be a follower, to go with the crowd, to just blend in. Those years of bullying added up, minor indignity after indignity, making clear the consequences of power. Harry Howell had power, and he wielded it with compassion and understanding. That wasn’t always easy for him, because he had to deal with a lot of immature kids. Others had power, like the bullies at school, and they found it far easier to wield it against those who were defenseless and to just go along with the group rather than stand up to it. I learned this lesson, too, in one of the great early mistakes of my life. * * * In 1978, I attended the College of William & Mary. I was one of many insecure, homesick, frightened kids living away from home for the first time, although we would admit none of that to one another, or even to ourselves. Because of overcrowding, I was among seventeen freshman boys living in a
”
”
James Comey (A Higher Loyalty: Truth, Lies, and Leadership)
“
LEADING LESSONS
Criticism can be useful.
I’ve taken a beating from the DWTS judges on many occasions. Most of the time, because I’m always aware of the cameras in my face, I just suck it up and take it. Here’s the thing: I realize that maybe they’re seeing something I’m not. Sometimes you’re too close to a situation, too connected to it, to be 100 percent honest with yourself. Or your ego gets in the way and won’t let you improve, because that would mean changing course and admitting you were wrong. I tell my partners to listen carefully when Len, Carrie Ann, or Bruno has a constructive criticism for us. Yes, sometimes it boils down to taste and opinion (and I don’t always agree), but often it’s a valid point. They want us to succeed. The way I see it, you have lots of choices on how to handle it: the first is to lose your temper, get defensive, and spend the rest of the night beating yourself up about it. The second--a natural reaction for most people--is to mentally shut down when someone points out your flaws. Who wants to hear that? Let me just drown it out and ignore it. The third option is your best: keep your mind and your ears open. You can learn about your weaknesses and how you can improve them. A leader is never scared of criticism, but instead knows there is always room to grow and improve. So bring it on.
”
”
Derek Hough (Taking the Lead: Lessons from a Life in Motion)
“
Don’t jump to conclusions over first impressions.
They’re often dead wrong. When I first met Mark, I thought he was spoiled. When I met Shirley, I assumed she was tough as nails. But getting to know them both as a member of their family, I saw how wrong I was. Shirley is a teddy bear, a caring, loving person who would do anything for me. And Mark? I think of him as a brother, in every sense of the word. I’ve learned to make a special effort to get to know the people who put up walls and seem cold or tough. It’s like an onion; you have to peel back the layers. I’m sure some of my DWTS partners made an assumption about who I was the first time they worked with me. They probably thought I was a tough taskmaster and cursed me out for putting them through this! But anyone who truly knows me will tell you, I’m harder on myself than I am on anyone else. And I’m a softie who loves to goof around. But to see that side of me, you need to move past the first impression. What’s the lesson here? Dig a little deeper. Get to know people and what makes them tick. Don’t make an assumption till you know someone a lot better. Think of all the people you might have dismissed who could have been great friends, mentors, or allies, if you’d only given them the chance.
Perfect example: dancing with Lil’ Kim on DWTS. She had recently spent time in jail and I remember thinking, Oh my gosh, I’m afraid I’m going to get shanked in the middle of the dance! Then I realized I was judging her without knowing her, something that I have hated people doing to me in the past. It took only a few minutes to see the sweet, loving person she truly was. Had I not given us the chance to get to know each other better, I never would have learned that.
”
”
Derek Hough (Taking the Lead: Lessons from a Life in Motion)
“
This book consists not only of my stories of mistakes, rather it’s all our stories of mistakes and heart aches. It’s the plight of all of us who were rebelling, and kicking against the social messes we found ourselves in. Yet there are so many others who are not alive today, and I feel obligated in not allowing the lessons of their mistakes to lie in the grave with them.
It was the United States Senator, Al Franken, who stated, “Mistakes are a part of being human. Precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from.” I’m revealing all of those mistakes and more, sadly a lot of them are fatal. In an attempt to have these real life lessons obtained in blood, prevent the blood-shedding of so many others. These stories are ones that young people can understand and identify with. While at the same time empowering them, to make better decisions about their choice of friends, the proper use of their time and how one wrong move can be fatal. I guess the major question that we all have to ask ourselves at the end of the day would be: how could I and so many others have been prevented from becoming monsters? You be the judge.
I now extend my hand to you, and personally invite you to take a journey with me into the heartlands of innocence to menacing, from a youngster to a monster, and the making of a predator. I will safely walk you down the deserted and darkened street corners which were once my world of crime, gang violence and senseless murders.
It’s a different world unto itself, one which could only be observed up close by invitation only. Together we will learn the motivation behind hard-core gangsters, and explore the minds of cold-blooded murderers. You will discover the way they think about their own lives, and why they are so remorseless about the taking of another’s life. So, if you will, please journey with me as we discover together how the fight of our lives were wrapped up in our fathers.
”
”
Drexel Deal (The Fight of My Life is Wrapped Up in My Father (The Fight of My Life is Wrapped in My Father Book 1))
“
Anarchism is the great liberator of man from the phantoms that have held him captive; it is the arbiter and pacifier of the two forces for individual and social harmony. To accomplish that unity, Anarchism has declared war on the pernicious influences which have so far prevented the harmonious blending of individual and social instincts, the individual and society. Religion, the dominion of the human mind; Property, the dominion of human needs; and Government, the dominion of human conduct, represent the stronghold of man's enslavement and all the horrors it entails. Religion! How it dominates man's mind, how it humiliates and degrades his soul. God is everything, man is nothing, says religion. But out of that nothing God has created a kingdom so despotic, so tyrannical, so cruel, so terribly exacting that naught but gloom and tears and blood have ruled the world since gods began. Anarchism rouses man to rebellion against this black monster. Break your mental fetters, says Anarchism to man, for not until you think and judge for yourself will you get rid of the dominion of darkness, the greatest obstacle to all progress. Property, the dominion of man's needs, the denial of the right to satisfy his needs. Time was when property claimed a divine right, when it came to man with the same refrain, even as religion, "Sacrifice! Abnegate! Submit!" The spirit of Anarchism has lifted man from his prostrate position. He now stands erect, with his face toward the light. He has learned to see the insatiable, devouring, devastating nature of property, and he is preparing to strike the monster dead. "Property is robbery," said the great French Anarchist, Proudhon. Yes, but without risk and danger to the robber. Monopolizing the accumulated efforts of man, property has robbed him of his birthright, and has turned him loose a pauper and an outcast. Property has not even the time-worn excuse that man does not create enough to satisfy all needs. The A B C student of economics knows that the productivity of labor within the last few decades far exceeds normal demand a hundredfold. But what are normal demands to an abnormal institution? The only demand that property recognizes is its own gluttonous appetite for greater wealth, because wealth means power; the power to subdue, to crush, to exploit, the power to enslave, to outrage, to degrade. America is particularly boastful of her great power, her enormous national wealth. Poor America, of what avail is all her wealth, if the individuals comprising the nation are wretchedly poor? If they live in squalor, in filth, in crime, with hope and joy gone, a homeless, soilless army of human prey. It is generally conceded that unless the returns of any business venture exceed the cost, bankruptcy is inevitable. But those engaged in the business of producing wealth have not yet learned even this simple lesson. Every year the cost of production in human life is growing larger (50,000 killed, 100,000 wounded in America last year); the returns to the masses, who help to create wealth, are ever getting smaller. Yet America continues to be blind to the inevitable bankruptcy of our business of production. Nor is this the only crime of the latter. Still more fatal is the crime of turning the producer into a mere particle of a machine, with less will and decision than his master of steel and iron. Man is being robbed not merely of the products of his labor, but of the power of free initiative, of originality, and the interest in, or desire for, the things he is making.
”
”
Emma Goldman (Anarchism and other essays (Illustrated))