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Neither his mother nor a child psychiatrist who is called in can comfort him, and they finally send for his father (the father was Bing Crosby and the little boy his son Lindsay in the Burns tale, because Crosby was also a Kraft entertainer at the time). The father tells his son that he will place the small turtle in a silver cigarette case, and bury it in a special private grave, complete with tiny headstone, just under the boy’s bedroom window, and arrange to have it light up when the child flicks a switch beside his bed at night. And so the father and his son went out into the kitchen to get the turtle, but they found it swimming about in its pan, not dead at all, but healthy as life itself. And the little boy looked up at his father and said, “Let’s kill him.” America’s one immortal written fable, I think, is Mark Twain’s episode of the two boys and the fence that has to be whitewashed. This situation pops up here and there in the literature of ye olde apologues, but Samuel Clemens did it better than any of the old professional fable writer. There have been other American fabulists, of course, and everybody of my advance years knows about George Ade’s experiments in putting fables into slang. The best of recent native fabulists was the late, neglected William March,
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