Humorous Inspirational Quotes

We've searched our database for all the quotes and captions related to Humorous Inspirational. Here they are! All 200 of them:

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It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.
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Lewis Carroll
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Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.
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Thomas Szasz
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Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
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Isaac Asimov (Foundation (Foundation, #1))
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I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass.
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Maya Angelou
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People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
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A.A. Milne (Winnie-the-Pooh (Winnie-the-Pooh, #1))
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So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life's A Great Balancing Act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ΒΎ percent guaranteed) Kid, you'll move mountains.
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Dr. Seuss (Oh, The Places You'll Go!)
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Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
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Will Rogers
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
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George Carlin
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The worst part of success is trying to find someone who is happy for you.
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Bette Midler
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What's the good of living if you don't try a few things?
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Charles M. Schulz
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I meant what I said and I said what I meant. An elephant's faithful one-hundred percent!
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Dr. Seuss (Horton Hatches the Egg)
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I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.
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John Green (An Abundance of Katherines)
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
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George Carlin
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Life sucks, and then you die...
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Stephenie Meyer (Breaking Dawn (Twilight, #4))
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I never made one of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking
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Albert Einstein
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I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.
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G.K. Chesterton
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A goal without a plan is just a wish.
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Antoine de Saint-ExupΓ©ry
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No! Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.
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George Lucas (The Star Wars Trilogy)
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If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.
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Taylor Swift
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Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.
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Winston S. Churchill
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When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.
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Lily Tomlin
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Write it. Shoot it. Publish it. Crochet it, sautΓ© it, whatever. MAKE.
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Joss Whedon
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Everything will turn out right, the world is built on that.
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Mikhail Bulgakov (The Master and Margarita)
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There are never enough 'I love you's.
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Lenny Bruce
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They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same.
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Kurt Cobain
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Congratulations! Today is your day. You're off to Great Places! You're off and away!
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Dr. Seuss (Oh, the Places You'll Go!)
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Gossip is just a tool to distract people who have nothing better to do from feeling jealous of those few of us still remaining with noble hearts.
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Anna Godbersen (Splendor (Luxe, #4))
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We don't have to be defined by the things we did or didn't do in our past. Some people allow themselves to be controlled by regret. Maybe it's a regret, maybe it's not. It's merely something that happened. Get over it.
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Pittacus Lore (I Am Number Four (Lorien Legacies, #1))
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Instead of committing suicide, people go to work.
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Thomas Bernhard (Correction)
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Angels can fly because they can take themselves lightly.
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G.K. Chesterton (Orthodoxy)
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Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy β€”the joy of being Salvador DalΓ­β€” and I ask myself in rapture: What wonderful things is this Salvador DalΓ­ going to accomplish today?
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Salvador DalΓ­
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It's just that in the Deep South, women learn at a young age that when the world is falling apart around you, it's time to take down the drapes and make a new dress.
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Karen Marie Moning (Faefever (Fever, #3))
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Laughter is carbonated holiness.
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Anne Lamott
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Few people know how to take a walk. The qualifications are endurance, plain clothes, old shoes, an eye for nature, good humor, vast curiosity, good speech, good silence and nothing too much.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken!
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Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club)
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We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
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Bill Hicks
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You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled.
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Ellen DeGeneres
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Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.
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Mindy Kaling (Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns))
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I used to think the world was broken down by tribes,' I said. 'By Black and White. By Indian and White. But I know this isn't true. The world is only broken into two tribes: the people who are assholes and the people who are not.
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Sherman Alexie (The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian)
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Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days.
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Ellen DeGeneres (The Funny Thing Is...)
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Nothing's a better cure for writer's block than to eat ice cream right out of the carton.
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Don Roff
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WATNEY: Look! A pair of boobs! -> (.Y.).
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Andy Weir (The Martian)
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Life has three rules: Paradox, Humor, and Change. - Paradox: Life is a mystery; don't waste your time trying to figure it out. - Humor: Keep a sense of humor, especially about yourself. It is a strength beyond all measure - Change: Know that nothing ever stays the same.
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Dan Millman (Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives)
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If you want to catch beasts you don't see every day, You have to go places quite out of the way, You have to go places no others can get to. You have to get cold and you have too get wet, too.
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Dr. Seuss
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Everything stinks till it’s finished.
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Dr. Seuss
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When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.
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Barney Stinson
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We lay there and looked up at the night sky and she told me about stars called blue squares and red swirls and I told her I'd never heard of them. Of course not, she said, the really important stuff they never tell you. You have to imagine it on your own.
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Brian Andreas
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All the time you're saying to yourself, 'I could do that, but I won't,' β€” which is just another way of saying that you can't.
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Richard P. Feynman (Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman!: Adventures of a Curious Character)
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And I thought that all those little kids are going to grow up someday. And all of those little kids are going to do the things that we do. And they will all kiss someone someday. But for now, sledding is enough. I think it would be great if sledding were always enough, but it isn't.
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Stephen Chbosky (The Perks of Being a Wallflower)
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Yes, I have tricks in my pocket, I have things up my sleeve. But I am the opposite of a stage magician. He gives you illusion that has the appearance of truth. I give you truth in the pleasant disguise of illusion.
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Tennessee Williams (The Glass Menagerie)
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To love is easy, to be in a relationship is extremely difficult.
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Santosh Kalwar (Quote Me Everyday)
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Whatever you see you gotta keep a sense of humor; you gotta be able to smile through all the bullshit.
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Tupac Shakur
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My hope still is to leave the world a bit better than when I got here.
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Jim Henson
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I always cheer up immensely if an attack is particularly wounding because I think, well, if they attack one personally, it means they have not a single political argument left.
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Margaret Thatcher
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It is harder to crack prejudice than an atom.
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Albert Einstein
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Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch or you might simply get covered in sap and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors where it is harder to get a splinter.
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Lemony Snicket (The Penultimate Peril (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #12))
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As you proceed through life, following your own path, birds will shit on you. Don't bother to brush it off. Getting a comedic view of your situation gives you spiritual distance. Having a sense of humor saves you.
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Joseph Campbell
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Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven't said enough!
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Karl Marx
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The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want for nothing. He makes me lie down in the green pastures. He greases up my head with oil. He gives me kung-fu in the face of my enemies. Amen
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Stephen King (The Stand)
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A photographer is like a cod, which produces a million eggs in order that one may reach maturity.
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George Bernard Shaw
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Life is and will ever remain an equation incapable of solution, but it contains certain known factors.
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Nikola Tesla
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The road to enlightenment is long and difficult, and you should try not to forget snacks and magazines.
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Anne Lamott (Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts on Faith)
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You know what I can't understand? You have all these people telling you all the time how great you are, smart and funny and talented and all that, I mean endlessly, I've been telling you for years. So why don't you believe it? why do you think people say that stuff, Em? Do you think it's a conspiracy, people secretly ganging up to be nice about you?
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David Nicholls (One Day)
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You don't have to make something that people call art. Living is an artistic activity, there is an art to getting through the day.
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Viggo Mortensen
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Get Off The Scale! You are beautiful. Your beauty, just like your capacity for life, happiness, and success, is immeasurable. Day after day, countless people across the globe get on a scale in search of validation of beauty and social acceptance. Get off the scale! I have yet to see a scale that can tell you how enchanting your eyes are. I have yet to see a scale that can show you how wonderful your hair looks when the sun shines its glorious rays on it. I have yet to see a scale that can thank you for your compassion, sense of humor, and contagious smile. Get off the scale because I have yet to see one that can admire you for your perseverance when challenged in life. It’s true, the scale can only give you a numerical reflection of your relationship with gravity. That’s it. It cannot measure beauty, talent, purpose, life force, possibility, strength, or love. Don’t give the scale more power than it has earned. Take note of the number, then get off the scale and live your life. You are beautiful!
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Steve Maraboli (Life, the Truth, and Being Free)
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We spend money that we do not have, on things we do not need, to impress people who do not care.
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Will Smith
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One thing I've learned about people is that the easiest way to get them to like you is to shut up and let them do the talking.
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Jesse Andrews (Me and Earl and the Dying Girl)
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I don't know why people are afraid of lust. Then I can imagine that they are very afraid of me, for I have a great lust for everything. A lust for life, a lust for how the summer-heated street feels beneath my feet, a lust for the touch of another's skin on my skin...a lust for everything. I even lust after cake. Yes, I am very lusty and very scary.
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C. JoyBell C.
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Rule #3 - It's okay to believe yourself better than the rest of the planet, so long as you keep it to yourself.
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Bisco Hatori (Ouran High School Host Club, Vol. 6 (Ouran High School Host Club, #6))
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I never did give them hell. I just told the truth, and they thought it was hell.
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Harry Truman
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If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing.
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Benjamin Franklin (Poor Richard's Almanack)
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Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.
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Kurt Vonnegut Jr. (Bagombo Snuff Box)
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Never trust a man with a penis.
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Darynda Jones (Third Grave Dead Ahead (Charley Davidson, #3))
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If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.
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John M. Gottman
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It occurs to me that our survival may depend upon our talking to one another.
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Dan Simmons (Hyperion)
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I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.
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Haim G. Ginott (Teacher and Child: A Book for Parents and Teachers)
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Believe me, It would be better if we didn't meet again. Go back to school. Go back to your life. And next time they ask you, say no. Killing is for grown-ups and you're still a child.
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Anthony Horowitz (Stormbreaker (Alex Rider, #1))
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Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
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Vote for the man who promises least; he'll be the least disappointing.
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Bernard M. Baruch
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In this country we have no place for hyphenated Americans.
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Theodore Roosevelt
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May the fleas of a thousand camels invade the crotch of the person that ruins your day. And may their arms be to short too scratch
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Kaida Ashia
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Plants are more courageous than almost all human beings: an orange tree would rather die than produce lemons, whereas instead of dying the average person would rather be someone they are not.
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Mokokoma Mokhonoana
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In the end, everything is a gag.
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Charlie Chaplin
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To ugly ducklings everywhere, Don't worry about those fluffy yellow morons: They'll never get to be swans
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ZoΓ« Marriott (The Swan Kingdom)
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One morning you wake up with more life behind you than in front of you, not being able to understand how it’s happened.
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Fredrik Backman (Britt-Marie var hΓ€r)
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90% of the game is half mental.
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Yogi Berra (The Yogi Book : I Really Didn't Say Everything I Said)
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Nothing gives you confidence like being a member of a small, weirdly specific, hard-to-find demographic.
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Mindy Kaling (Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns))
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There is no need to search; achievement leads to nowhere. It makes no difference at all, so just be happy now! Love is the only reality of the world, because it is all One, you see. And the only laws are paradox, humor and change. There is no problem, never was, and never will be. Release your struggle, let go of your mind, throw away your concerns, and relax into the world. No need to resist life, just do your best. Open your eyes and see that you are far more than you imagine. You are the world, you are the universe; you are yourself and everyone else, too! It's all the marvelous Play of God. Wake up, regain your humor. Don't worry, just be happy. You are already free!
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Dan Millman (Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives)
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And empty words are evil.
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Homer (The Odyssey)
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Envy is for people who don’t have the self-esteem to be jealous.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
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God helps those who strut their stuff.
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Dan Sofer (A Love and Beyond)
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You don't always have to kiss a lot of frogs to recognize a prince when you find one -Henrietta Barett
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Julia Quinn (Minx (The Splendid Trilogy, #3))
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It's okay to be a loser, it just depends on how good you are at being one.
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Billie Joe Armstrong
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Because I trust in the ever-changing climate of the heart. (At least, today I feel that way.) I think it is necessary to have many experiences for the sake of feeling something; for the sake of being challenged, and for the sake of being expressive, to offer something to someone else, to learn what we are capable of.
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Jason Mraz
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YOU are the big drop of dew under the lotus leaf, I am the smaller one on its upper side,' said the dewdrop to the lake.
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Rabindranath Tagore
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You have come to earth to entertain and to be entertained.
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Paramahansa Yogananda (Autobiography of a Yogi)
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Philosophy of science is about as useful to scientists as ornithology is to birds.
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Richard P. Feynman
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I liked things better when I didn't understand them.
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Bill Watterson
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That's chess!" snapped Ron. "You've got to make some sacrifices!
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J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (Harry Potter #1))
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He had never known such gallantry as the gallantry of Scarlett O'Hara going forth to conquer the world in her mother's velvet curtains and the tail feathers of a rooster.
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Margaret Mitchell (Gone with the Wind)
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...it’s just another one of those things I don’t understand: everyone impresses upon you how unique you are, encouraging you to cultivate your individuality while at the same time trying to squish you and everyone else into the same ridiculous mould. It’s an artist’s right to rebel against the world’s stupidity.
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E.A. Bucchianeri (Brushstrokes of a Gadfly, (Gadfly Saga, #1))
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The process of learning is a nonstop orgy of wonderment.
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Lev Grossman (The Magicians (The Magicians, #1))
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Hearts can't be broken because they're made of marzipan.
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Kerstin Gier (SmaragdgrΓΌn (Edelstein-Trilogie, #3))
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I'm not going to die, I'm going home like a shooting star.
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Sojourner Truth
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At a certain age almost all the questions a person asks him or herself are really just about one thing: how should you live your life?
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Fredrik Backman (Britt-Marie Was Here)
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I am no king, and I am no lord, And I am no soldier at-arms," said he. "I'm none but a harper, and a very poor harper, That am come hither to wed with ye." "If you were a lord, you should be my lord, And the same if you were a thief," said she. "And if you are a harper, you shall be my harper, For it makes no matter to me, to me, For it makes no matter to me." "But what if it prove that I am no harper? That I lied for your love most monstrously?" "Why, then I'll teach you to play and sing, For I dearly love a good harp," said she.
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Peter S. Beagle (The Last Unicorn (The Last Unicorn, #1))
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Masalah adalah apa yang kamu anggap masalah
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Pidi Baiq
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Can't stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Wretched things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I'll tell them what to do. Don't get bitten in the first place. (quoting Dr. Struan Sutherland)
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Douglas Adams
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Girls have got balls. They're just a little higher up, that's all.
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Joan Jett
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Don't count your owls before they are delivered.
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J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Harry Potter, #6))
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The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
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On Wednesday, when the sky is blue, and I have nothing else to do, I sometimes wonder if it's true That who is what and what is who." - Winnie-the-Pooh
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A.A. Milne
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No matter where life takes me, you'll find me with a smile. Presumed to be happy, always laughing like a child. I never thought life could be this sweet! It's got me cheesing from cheek to cheek!
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Mac Miller
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Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.
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Anne Lamott (Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life)
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It was the living who ignored the strange and wonderful, because life was too full of the boring and mundane.
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Terry Pratchett (Reaper Man (Discworld, #11; Death, #2))
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I have something that I call my Golden Rule. It goes something like this: 'Do unto others twenty-five percent better than you expect them to do unto you.' … The twenty-five percent is for error.
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Linus Pauling
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Sometimes, there is no harm in putting off a piece of work until another day.
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Antoine de Saint-ExupΓ©ry (The Little Prince)
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When I was One, I had just begun. When I was Two, I was nearly new. When I was Three I was hardly me. When I was Four, I was not much more. When I was Five, I was just alive. But now I am Six, I'm as clever as clever, So I think I'll be six now for ever and ever.
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A.A. Milne (Now We Are Six (Winnie-the-Pooh, #4))
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Parents always make their worst mistakes with their oldest children. That's when parents know the least and care the most, so they're more likely to be wrong and also more likely to insist that they're right.
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Orson Scott Card (Xenocide (Ender's Saga, #3))
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My father chose my name , and my last name was chosen by my ancestors . That’s enough, I myself choose my way
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Ali Shariati
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Of all the idiots I have met in my life, and the Lord knows they have not been few or little, I think that I have been the biggest.
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Karen Blixen
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The universe is a million billion light-years wide, and every inch of it would kill you if you went there. This is the position of the universe with regards to human life.
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Martin Amis
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There are few sources of energy so powerful as a procrastinating college student.
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Paul Graham (Hackers & Painters: Big Ideas from the Computer Age)
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Imagination, not intelligence, made us human.
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Terry Pratchett
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And...I think that's what life is all about, actually, about children and flowers.
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Audrey Hepburn
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Earth is sad, Moon is shy, Sun is happy but wait a moment, I just forgot to tell you that I am the child of open sky.
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Santosh Kalwar
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A real scientist solves problems, not wails that they are unsolvable.
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Anne McCaffrey (Acorna: The Unicorn Girl (Acorna #1))
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Great we're bloody inspired
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James Dashner (The Maze Runner (The Maze Runner, #1))
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All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. Great works are often born on a street corner or in a restaurant's revolving door.
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Albert Camus
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If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style.
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Quentin Crisp (The Naked Civil Servant; How To Become A Virgin; Resident Alien)
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I'm gonna be percy Jackson when I grow up," she told Hazel solemnly. Hazel Smiled and ruffled her hair. "That's a good thing to be, Julia." "Although," Frank said. "Frank Zhang would be good too.
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Rick Riordan (The Son of Neptune (The Heroes of Olympus, #2))
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I used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boss was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law.
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Chris Rock
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The typical expression of opening Friendship would be something like, 'What? You too? I thought I was the only one!
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C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)
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The difference between an optimist and a pessimist? An optimist laughs to forget but a pessimist forgets to laugh.
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Tom Bodett
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That's the scary thing about hope," she said. "If you let it go too long it turns into faith.
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Christopher Moore (Coyote Blue)
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We are all here on earth to help others: what on earth the others are here for, I don't know.
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W.H. Auden
β€œ
The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
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Men only treat women like princesses when they want to use them like prostitutes.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
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...the day shit is worth money, poor people will be born without an asshole
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Gabriel GarcΓ­a MΓ‘rquez (The Autumn of the Patriarch)
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Menurut survei: selain narik becak dan gali kubur, pekerjaan mengkhayal dan menulis ternyata juga butuh asupan kalori tinggi. (Perahu Kertas)
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Dee Lestari
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For women, shoes are the most important. Good shoes take you good places.
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Seo Min Hyun
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Islam expect every Muslim to do this duty, and if we realise our responsibility time will come soon when we shall justify ourselves worthy of a glorious past.
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Muhammad Ali Jinnah
β€œ
Hash, x. There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is. Famous, adj. Conspicuously miserable. Dictionary, n. A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.
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Ambrose Bierce (The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary)
β€œ
Let go of the people who dull your shine, poison your spirit, and bring you drama. Cancel your subscription to their issues.
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Steve Maraboli (Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience)
β€œ
Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother and we should respect her
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Shikamaru Nara
β€œ
When you write from your gut and let the stuff stay flawed and don't let anybody tell you to make it better, it can end up looking like nothing else.
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Louis C.K.
β€œ
In the English language, it all comes down to this: Twenty-six letters, when combined correctly, can create magic. Twenty -six letters form the foundation of a free, informed society.
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John Grogan (Bad Dogs Have More Fun: Selected Writings on Family, Animals, and Life from The Philadelphia Inquirer)
β€œ
I go on the presumption that everyone's full of shit until proven otherwise, and this usually serves me in good stead.
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Dennis Lehane (A Drink Before the War (Kenzie & Gennaro, #1))
β€œ
If you can't enjoy what you have, you can't enjoy more of it.
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Richard Bandler
β€œ
First people lose their hair, then their vices, then their motivation. Then a toupee brings it all flowing back.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
β€œ
I don’t want to be a supermodel; I want to be a role model.
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Queen Latifah
β€œ
Nothing but good times ahead.
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Jennifer Crusie (Welcome to Temptation (Dempseys, #1))
β€œ
Enjoy every ounce of your life, get high and be sincere to anybody that comes around you.
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Salman Aditya (High in School)
β€œ
Certainly there are things in life that money can’t buy, but it’s very funny – Did you ever try buying them without money.
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Ogden Nash
β€œ
People go to church for the same reasons they go to a tavern: to stupefy themselves, to forget their misery, to imagine themselves, for a few minutes anyway, free and happy. -- Circular Letter to My Friends in Italy
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Mikhail Bakunin
β€œ
Bean finds the best apple in our tree and hands it up to me. "You know what this tastes like when you first bite into it?" she asks. "No, what?" "Blue sky." "You're zoomed." "You ever eat blue sky?" "No," I admit. "Try it sometime," she says. "It's apple-flavored.
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Rodman Philbrick (The Last Book in the Universe)
β€œ
I don't know where my ideas come from. I will admit, however, that one key ingredient is caffeine. I get a couple cups of coffee into me and weird things just start to happen.
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Gary Larson
β€œ
Of course we got drunk!" Semyon said. "It's okay to get drunk, Anton. If you need to real bad. Only you have to get drunk on vodka. Cognac and wineβ€”that's all for the heart." "So what's vodka for?" "For the soul. If it's hurting real bad
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Sergei Lukyanenko (Night Watch (Watch #1))
β€œ
Theology, philosophy, metaphysics, and quantum physics are merely ways for God to have his smart people believe in him
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Jeremy Aldana
β€œ
I like Dancing of Indian girls more than my parents’ prayers . Because they dance with love and passion . But my parents just say their prayers because they got used to it .
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Ali Shariati
β€œ
The recipe for great art has always been misery and a good bowel movement.
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Don Roff
β€œ
A writer flirts with schizophrenia, nurtures synesthesia, and embraces obsessive-compulsive disorder. Your art feeds on you, your soul, and, yes, to a degree, your sanity. Writing novels worth reading will bugger up your mind, jeopardize your relationships, and distend your life. You have been warned.
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David Mitchell (The Bone Clocks)
β€œ
You know what Marshall needs to do. He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead. True story.
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Barney Stinson
β€œ
Sometimes, things don't work out the way we want them to.
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Nicholas Sparks (A Bend in the Road)
β€œ
Boggle with sex addicts is up there with go-kart racing with junkies.
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Russell Brand (My Booky Wook)
β€œ
If I don't poke my head out of my shell and show people who I am, all anyone will ever think I am is my shell.
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Shonda Rhimes (Year of Yes)
β€œ
I shed a tear when I meet somebody who always quits. Reliable people are so rare in this world.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
β€œ
I never had any doubts about my abilities. I knew I could write. I just had to figure out how to eat while doing this. [Cormac McCarthy's Venomous Fiction, New York Times, April 19, 1992]
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Cormac McCarthy
β€œ
Pakistan not only means freedom and independence but the Muslim Ideology which has to be preserved, which has come to us as a precious gift and treasure and which, we hope other will share with us.
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Muhammad Ali Jinnah
β€œ
the one that can hurt you the most are the one that you really love
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Salman Aditya (High in School)
β€œ
Everything is perfect. Everything is fine. The rules of life are made up. The rules only exist in your mind. Of course there may be courtesies And closures and laws to abide, But the zeal with which you play Relies on where YOU draw the line
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Jason Mraz
β€œ
Every good idea sooner or later degenerates into hard work.
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Calvin Trillin
β€œ
People either have comedy or they don't. You can't teach it to them.
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Lucille Ball
β€œ
Worry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.
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Keith Caserta (Soul Searching (Nodes of God, #1))
β€œ
I was kind of excited to go to jail for the first time and I learnt some great dialogue.
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Quentin Tarantino
β€œ
Do you want to know the world? Then look at it closely. Do you want to like it? Then look at it from afar.
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Ion Luca Caragiale
β€œ
Aku telah mengidap sakit gila nomor enam belas: yakni penyakit manusia yang membuat dunia sendiri dalam kepalanya, menciptakan masalah-masalahnya sendiri, terpuruk di dalamnya, lalu menyelesaikan masalah-masalah itu, sambil tertawa-tawa, juga sendirian.
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Andrea Hirata (Maryamah Karpov: Mimpi-mimpi Lintang)
β€œ
You cannot take away freedom to protect it, you cannot destroy the free market to save it, and you cannot uphold freedom of speech by silencing those with whom you disagree. To take rights away to defend them or to spend your way out of debt defies common sense.
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Glenn Beck (Glenn Beck's Common Sense: The Case Against an Out-of-Control Government, Inspired by Thomas Paine)
β€œ
The problem with our society is that our values aren’t in the right place. There’s an awful lot of bleeding and naked bodies on prime-time networks, but not nearly enough cable television on public programming.
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Bauvard (Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic)
β€œ
There comes a time when you're losing a fight that it just doesn't make sense to keep on fighting. It's not that you're being a quitter, it's just that you've got the sense to know when enough is enough.
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Christopher Paul Curtis (Bud, Not Buddy)
β€œ
Some of us go full circle. Some of us blindly go nowhere. The circle doesn’t have to be very large to make a point, kick your ass and/or be entertaining. Remember that and stay light. Even the deaf know good music when they hear it.
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Jason Mraz
β€œ
Buy or borrow self-improvement books, but don't read them. Stack them around your bedroom and use them as places to rest bowls of cookies. Watch exercise shows on television, but don't do the exercises. Practice believing that the benefit lies in imagining yourself doing the exercises. Don't power walk. Saunter slowly in the sun, eating chocolate, and carry a blanket so you can take a nap.
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S.A.R.K.
β€œ
You know what? I was wrong. You are an idiot. My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it's not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening.
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Joss Whedon
β€œ
Loving someone and having them love you back is the most precious thing in the world. It's what made it possible for me to go on, but you don't seem to realize that. Even when love is right there in front of you, you choose to turn away from it. You're alone because you want to be.
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Nicholas Sparks (The Rescue)
β€œ
You'll enjoy it. There is much you can learn from books and scrolls," said Jeod. He gestured at the walls. "These books are my friends, my companions. They make me laugh and cry and find meaning in life." "It sounds intriguing," admitted Eragon. "Always the scholar, aren't you?" asked Brom. Jeod shrugged. "Not anymore. I'm afraid I've degenerated into a bibliophile.
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Christopher Paolini (Eragon (The Inheritance Cycle, #1))
β€œ
Mister Dresden," he said. "And Miss Rodriguez, I believe. I didn't realize you were an art collector." "I am the foremost collector of velvet Elvii in the city of Chicago," I said at once. "Elvii?" Marcone inquired. "The plural could be Elvises, I guess," I said. "But if I say that too often, I start muttering to myself and calling things 'my precious,' so I usually go with the Latin plural.
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Jim Butcher (Death Masks (The Dresden Files, #5))
β€œ
Life is All About How you Handle Plan B Plan A is always my first choice. You know, the one where Everything works out to be Happily ever-after. But more often than not, I find myself dealing with The upside-down, inside-out version -- Where nothing goes as it should. It's at this point that the real Test of my character comes in.. Do I sink, or do I swim? Do I wallow in self pity and play the victim, Or simply shift gears And make the best of the situation? The choice is all mine... Life is all about how you handle Plan B.
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Suzy Toronto (The Sacred Sisterhood Of Wonderful Wacky Women)
β€œ
No matter what you feel is holding you back in life, you can attempt anything. Repeat that motivational cup sentence until it gets in your gut and doesn’t sound like something stupid on a Hallmark card, because it is the basis for anything that will make you happy in this world.
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Felicia Day (You're Never Weird on the Internet (Almost))
β€œ
I knew then that I would devote every minute we had left together to making her happy, to repairing the pain I had caused her and returning to her what I never known how to give her. These pages will be our memory until she drows her last breath in my arms and I take her forever and escape at last to a place where neither heaven nor hell will ever be able to find us.
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Carlos Ruiz ZafΓ³n
β€œ
Sometimes you go through things that seem huge at the time, like a mysterious glowing cloud devouring your entire community. While they're happening, they feel like the only thing that matters and you can hardly imagine that there's a world out there that might have anything else going on. And then the glow cloud moves on. And you move on. And the event is behind you. And you may find, as time passes, that you remember it less and less. Or absolutely not at all, in my case.
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Cecil Baldwin
β€œ
Love does not cost anything. Kind words and deeds do not cost anything. The real beauty of the world is equal for everyone to see. It was given by God equally to all, without restrictions. Everyone, was given a beautiful vehicle in which to express love to others. Feelings are free to express and give to ourselves and each other through our willingness to give and care. What is complicated about this... Why have we made others feel they have to climb mountains and swim oceans in order to make a difference. All we need to understand my friends, is that human life was given equally to us all, not partially but in totality. The sun was given to all. It does not shine on the few. So, just has nature is indifferent to our station or situation, we need to know that we are all equal. We need to focus on the things that are constant and not place our values on things that can be blown away with the next, great, wind. Value life in what ever house it dwells. For when it comes time that we are all stripped to bare bones before the divine and facing eternity, we will understand that the only law we were meant to follow, was to love ourselves and each other. Nothing more...nothing less.
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Carla Jo Masterson
β€œ
As for my brothers,' Zeus said, 'we are thankful -' he cleared his throat, like the words were hard to get out - 'erm, thankful for the aid of Hades.' The Lord of the Dead nodded. He had a smug look on his face, but I figure he'd earned the right. He patted his son Nico on the shoulders, and Nico looked happier than I'd ever seen him.
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Rick Riordan (The Last Olympian (Percy Jackson and the Olympians, #5))
β€œ
You might not think a hippo could inspire terror. Screaming β€œHippo!” doesn’t have the same impact as screaming β€œShark!” But I’m telling youβ€”as the Egyptian Queen careened to one side, its paddle wheel lifting completely out of the water, and I saw that monster emerge from the deep, I nearly discovered the hieroglyphs for accident in my pants.
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Rick Riordan (The Serpent's Shadow (The Kane Chronicles, #3))
β€œ
Fear and shame are the backbone of my self-control. They are my source of inspiration, my insurance against becoming entirely unacceptable. They help me do the right thing. And I am terrified of what I would be without them. Because I suspect that, left to my own devices, I would completely lose control of my life. I'm still hoping that perhaps someday I'll learn how to use willpower like a real person, but until that very unlikely day, I will confidently battle toward adequacy, wielding my crude skill set of fear and shame.
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Allie Brosh (Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things That Happened)
β€œ
My dad likes to say, β€˜Life is never simple’. This is one of his favourite aphorisms. I actually think it’s incorrect. Life is often simple, but you don’t notice how simple it was until it gets incredibly complicated, like how you never feel grateful for being well until you’re ill, or how you never appreciate your tights drawer until you rip a pair and have no spares.
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Beth O'Leary (The Flatshare)
β€œ
Christian does a great job helping an aspiring writer get inspired to write and finish their book. It’s easy to read and understand, and provides encouragement and specific guidance, without being too harsh or detailed on fiction writing only. If you are struggling with how to put your thoughts onto paper, give this a read and establish a rhythm for your writing. Christian’s success at completing over 21 published manuscripts while leading a busy life are testament in if there is a will, there is a way. And it provides some good humor throughout.” Rachel Braynin, Sr Program Manager at Lulu Publishing
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Christian Warren Freed (So...You Want to Write a Book?)
β€œ
In fact that is why the lives of most women are so vaguely unsatisfactory. They are always doing secondary and menial things (that do not require all their gifts and ability) for others and never anything for themselves. Society and husbands praise them for it (when they get too miserable or have nervous breakdowns) though always a little perplexedly and half-heartedly and just to be consoling. The poor wives are reminded that that is just why wives are so splendid -- because they are so unselfish and self-sacrificing and that is the wonderful thing about them! But inwardly women know that something is wrong. They sense that if you are always doing something for others, like a servant or nurse, and never anything for yourself, you cannot do others any good. You make them physically more comfortable. But you cannot affect them spiritually in any way at all. For to teach, encourage, cheer up, console, amuse, stimulate or advise a husband or children or friends, you have to be something yourself. [...]"If you would shut your door against the children for an hour a day and say; 'Mother is working on her five-act tragedy in blank verse!' you would be surprised how they would respect you. They would probably all become playwrights.
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Brenda Ueland
β€œ
Chapter One of My Life. I walk down the street. There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost. I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It still takes forever to find a way out. Chapter Two. I walk down the same street. There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I'm in the same place! But it isn't my fault. And it still takes a long time to get out. Chapter Three. I walk down the same street. There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it there. I still fall in. It's a habit! My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. Chapter Four. I walk down the same street. There's a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. Chapter Five. I walk down a different street.
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Portia Nelson (There's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery)
β€œ
But mostly, I remembered what I’ve always believed. What my mom taught me. That while some things are just plain awful, most things in life can be seen either tragic or comic. And it’s your choice. Is life a big, long, tiresome slog from sadness to regret to guilt to resentment to self-pity? Or is life weird, outrageous, bizarre, ironic, and just stupid? Gotta go with stupid. It’s not the easy way out. Self-pity is the easiest thing in the world. Finding the humor, the irony, the slight justification for a skewed, skeptical optimism, that’s tough.
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Katherine Applegate (The Proposal (Animorphs, #35))
β€œ
A smile is the best way to get oneself out of a tight spot, even if it is a fake one. Surprisingly enough, everyone takes it at face value. I read that in a book." "If you keep staring at me, I'll hit you." "I only became part of your team recently when I replaced Sasuke, so I don't know everything that's going on. I don't really understand people either. But even I can tell that Naruto really loves you. Naruto's been shouldering that promise for a long time...I think he means to shoulder it for the rest of his life. I don't know what you said to him, but it's just like what's been done to me - it feels like a curse. Sasuke causes Naruto pain, but I think you do too." "Sasuke is only helping spread his darkness across the world. Letting him live will only sow the seeds of another war. He's just another criminal now. Sasuke lost all hope of coming back when his group, Akatsuki, attacked our village. Your fellow Konoha shinobi would never accept him now. Sakura's not stupid, either. She understands the position he's put us all in. That's why she came out here, to tell you herself.
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Masashi Kishimoto