Good Snorkeling Quotes

One of the things that made Nate and Stevie such good friends was their mutual hatred of sharing emotional things. Somehow, they managed to have a deeper bond by staying on the surface—as if they were snorkeling their feelings, floating along side by side, observing all of nature’s wonders without getting close enough to be stung by something under a rock.

Ok, this farmer is driving down the road in his truck and he comes to a state cop in the middle of the road with the blue flashing and everything, and the farmer asks, What's the problem, Officer? The cop looks worried and nods on ahead where this pig is sitting right in the middle of the road-big damn pig- and the cop says, Got a problem with this pig in the road. So the farmer says, Hmmm. And the cop says, Hey I got an idea, Why don't we load this pig into your truck and then you take him to the zoo? And the farmer says, Well, I reckon we could do that. So they load they pig into the farmer's truck and off the farmer drives and that's that. So the next day the cop is out there on the road again because that is his usual speed trap, and who do you think drives by? The farmer--and sitting right next to him in the cab is the pig. And the pig's wearing a baseball hat! The farmer and the pig just go cruising by. So the cop shakes off the unreality of the whole situation, fires up the blue flashing light and sirens and gets scratch in 3 gears tearing out after the farmer, and caught up pretty soon and pulls the farmer over and walks up to the truck. The farmer looks real casual and says, Yessir. The cop says, Hey, I thought I told you to take that pig to the zoo! And the farmer says, I did! We had a good time, too, so today I thought we'd go to the ball game. HA! HA! HA!

On an Antarctic expedition in 1985 and ‘86, a man named Gareth Wood was walking on ice when a leopard seal emerged from a fissure and bit him on the leg. One of Wood’s companions kicked the seal repeatedly with his cramponed boot, drawing blood from its head, until it let go. It came back for a second bite. This time two companions kicked the seal; it let go for good. In 2003, a scientist with the British Antarctic Survey was snorkeling when a leopard seal seized and drowned her.

MYTH648. | Elephants are too heavy to swim. Elephants love water and can smell it from five miles away. They are also good swimmers and have been known to use their trunks as snorkels.

It took five minutes for the barkeep to come around. He was an old salt—tall and thin. So grizzled he looked like he’d been here back when Ponce de León first showed up. Letty ordered a vodka martini. While he shook it, she eavesdropped on a conversation between an older couple seated beside her. They sounded midwestern. The man was talking about someone named John, and how much he wished John had been with them today. They had gone snorkeling in the Dry Tortugas. The woman chastised her husband for getting roasted in the sun, but he expertly steered the conversation away from himself. They talked about other places they’d been together. Their top three bottles of wine. Their top three sunsets. How much they were looking forward to a return trip to Italy. How much they were looking forward to Christmas next week with their children and grandchildren. These people had seen the world. They had loved and laughed and lived.

even tries to snorkel under the plants, but when it comes up for air it gets blasted by a Repeater you’ve placed on a Lily Pad. Finally, the zombie wave stops. You collapse on the grass, exhausted. “Hey, anybody want to go swimming?” Matt asks. You think of the Tangle Kelp lurking under the water and shudder. “Um, I don’t think that’s a good

The sneer was especially galling because it came from the enlightened, from people she secretly admired. Vibrant, intelligent, cultured people, who jogged and took holidays in Communist China or snorkeled in the Caribbean and who read the latest books and had token families. They were robust into their seventies, and they leaned far to the left on their ski poles. They believed it was better to kill a child than to kill a whale. I believed that both were forms of violation, but the former was surely the greater evil. Maya agreed with me in theory until she gradually discovered that all the best people thought differently. She wanted to be countercultural and a social success. She didn’t mind despising that poor old yuppie and his kind for their blindness, but she never did learn to take it when they despised her in turn for failing to hold the correct opinions. There was a new orthodoxy abroad in the land, and she had somehow missed the cue during her few years tucked away in a remote valley with good old reactionary me. When she finally figured out what our way of life would cost, she began to suffer. She had been taught from birth to avoid unpleasantness. As a result, her inability to deal with the peculiar existential pain of the anathematized, the social pariah, later undid our marriage.

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