Drained Empath Quotes

There are only two kinds of people who can drain your energy: those you love, and those you fear. In both instances it is you who let them in. They did not force their way into your aura, or pry their way into your reality experience.

An (emotional) vampire goes in for the kill by stirring up your emotions. Pushing your buttons throws you off center, which renders you easier to drain. Of all the emotional types, empaths are often the most devestated.

When we dim our light to make others feel more comfortable, the whole world gets darker.

I pledge allegiance to myself and to my Soul for which I stand. I honor my goodness, my gifts, and my talents. I commit to remaining loyal to myself from this moment forward for all of my days.

To heal our past, we must first become aware of how Darkness works. Shining a light on it is the first step. And then forgiving ourselves and being unconditionally loving—and also changing our behavior, if necessary—is the next step to clean up the legacy for good.

Empaths have to be careful not to internalize others’ feelings, as this can cause them to feel anxious, sad, or even depressed. It can leave the empath feeling drained or exhausted. They must learn to set boundaries so as not to let toxic people drain them dry.

Once you face down your fears of saying no, you’ll be much better able to stick to situations that don’t drain you.

You must first feel as bad as you’re feeling and move your emotions of anger and hurt out of your body. You do this by feeling them fully and expressing them in a safe way.

Every morning before you get out of bed, say the following: “I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same.

Dr. Mario Martinez teaches that love is toxic to a toxic person. And that there are only so many milligrams of love that a toxic person can take before they become mean or nasty.

If someone is snarky or critical, I no longer try to “buff them up,” send love, or try to explain my position. If the comment is nasty or a put-down, I just delete it. If it happens again, I simply press “ban user.

We must also learn to respect our shadow—that part of us we try to hide so others won’t know how we “really” are. This includes our negativity, sorrow, jealousy, anger, and grief.

It’s very easy to diagnose a borderline. They screw you over, rip you off, commit whatever transgression, and then they blame you for it.

The reason 12-step programs can be so helpful is that, very often, empaths become addicted to their vampire partners.

the sooner you give up on them and choose you, the healthier, happier, and more effective you will become.

We don’t even know that we’re dealing with one of these masters of Darkness until we become physically ill, lose our friends, our jobs, our incomes, our fertile years, and eventually even our self-esteem and dignity.

Set clear limits with energy vampires and toxic people. Remember that “no” is a complete sentence. You don’t have to keep explaining yourself. I am adamant about avoiding draining people, particularly when I’m overloaded.

So take a look at your own life. How many of your friends or, worse yet, family members, call you only when they want something or have a problem? Notice how these same people never call you just to check in on how you’re doing.

Do not make the mistake of thinking that you can defend yourself against this. You can’t. Just walk away. Don’t try to make your case. At the end of the day, you will be judged by your behavior—not your words. Walking away is very powerful.

If your mate is not overall 51 percent valuable, you cannot stay with them and remain healthy. Being in a toxic relationship may be a sign of unconditional love, but it’s also a sign that you love them more than yourself. That is a sign of mental illness.

Whenever you do something that you consider a mistake—like spilling something, tripping, forgetting an appointment, feeling sad, getting angry, or feeling stuck—notice it and congratulate yourself. This is so counterintuitive that it will instantly shift your energy.

One more tip. Gay Hendricks came up with what he calls the “Ultimate Success Mantra” as a good place to start. Every morning before you get out of bed, say the following: “I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same.

Here’s the deal. When another individual is completely disconnected from their well-being and their joy, this has absolutely nothing to do with you on any level. You didn’t attract this. You are not responsible for it. The only thing you are responsible for is your own energy field. And when you learn how to pay attention to that—and only that—you’re free.

So what does the life of an empath look like? The short answer to this is “hiding.” Empaths often take extreme measures to contort their true identities into something less painful. They become very good at blending in and figuring out how to be loved and accepted not for who they really are but instead for how they can serve others. For example, if an empathic homosexual child is born into a very conservative family, that child will very quickly know how to suppress his true self in service to his family’s belief system. Or if an empathic, creative, energetic child is born into a family that values logic and study, the child will soon become subdued and work to prove her worth through family-approved pursuits.

Because of our tendency to attract lost and wounded souls, we generally tend to wind up having one-sided, needy, and draining friendships. Having big hearts, we feel that it’s against our nature to turn away those in need of help or an open and empathetic ear. The result is that we get sucked into exhausting, unfulfilling, and sometimes even narcissistic friendships.

am fascinated by this gap in work and perception. The answer, I think, lies in that space between the work husbands do and the work they think they do. What noticing is lost here? In her book The Time Bind, Arlie Russell Hochschild writes that this work is upkeep, it is labor, and much like the work of home repair, it requires “noticing, acknowledging, and empathizing with the feelings of family members, patching up quarrels, and soothing hurt feelings.” In sum, the work of a home, of a life, is paying attention. Knowing that the dishwasher drain needs to be cleaned, that the counter is sticky, that the socks need to be matched: It’s the work of noticing that isn’t being done. And what is lost when the people who love us do not see our labor? It’s our happiness. —

Unsuspecting empaths often open their hearts, their bank accounts, and their bodies in order to help these vampires heal their so-called wounds, which actually don’t exist. This is not because the empath is a fool. It results, instead, from the perfect storm of the empath’s desire to be a healing force in the world, combined with the predatory skills of the vampire—and, very often, the unhealed wounds of the empath, who often doesn’t feel worthy of the best life has to offer.

Empaths have the ability to assimilate the emotions and even the physical sensations of others, making them deeply attentive, warm, compassionate, and insightful people. But, on the other hand, such a high degree of sensitivity to other people’s emotional energy is also what makes empaths so prone to issues such as anxiety, depression, and stress-related illnesses. When left unmanaged, this gift can result in feeling overwhelmed and chronically drained by others, and even in being emotionally preyed upon.

Most of the women (and also men) afflicted by energy vampires are compassionate, loving, and deeply concerned about the well-being of the people around them. They interact with the energy of other people to a degree that puts them well past being merely compassionate. They don’t simply feel an observational sadness when they see someone suffer; they feel the same suffering, as if they are having a firsthand experience of the pain they are witnessing. These women fall into a category of people known as empaths. My guess is that if you’re reading

SELF-ASSESSMENT​Are You an Empath? To find out, take the following empath self-assessment, answering “mostly yes” or “mostly no” to each question. •​Have I ever been labeled overly sensitive, shy, or introverted? •​Do I frequently get overwhelmed or anxious? •​Do arguments and yelling make me ill? •​Do I often feel like I don’t fit in? •​Do crowds drain me, and do I need alone time to revive myself? •​Do noise, odors, or nonstop talkers overwhelm me? •​Do I have chemical sensitivities or a low tolerance for scratchy clothes? •​Do I prefer taking my own car to places so that I can leave early if I need to? •​Do I overeat to cope with stress? •​Am I afraid of becoming suffocated by intimate relationships? •​Do I startle easily? •​Do I react strongly to caffeine or medications? •​Do I have a low threshold for pain? •​Do I tend to socially isolate? •​Do I absorb other people’s stress, emotions, or symptoms? •​Am I overwhelmed by multitasking, and do I prefer to do one thing at a time? •​Do I replenish myself in nature? •​Do I need a long time to recuperate after being with difficult people or energy vampires? •​Do I feel better in small towns or the country rather than large cities? •​Do I prefer one-to-one interactions and small groups to large gatherings? Now calculate your results. •​If you answered yes to one to five questions, you’re at least a partial empath. •​If you answered yes to six to ten questions, you have moderate empath tendencies. •​If you answered yes to eleven to fifteen questions, you have strong empath tendencies. •​If you answered yes to more than fifteen questions, you are a full-blown empath.

Remember, they are born this way. Just as you didn’t choose to be born as an empath, they didn’t choose to be born with their personality. So the goal here isn’t to judge them as evil or try to fix them. It is simply to avoid them, or at the very least, set up very healthy boundaries, and save yourself.

One of the best ways to minimize your interaction with energy vampires is to become “empowered in the negative.” In other words, learn how to turn people down, even if you have to hurt them a bit in the process. This is essential. Be like those old drug commercials: Just Say No.

Tami Lynn Kent added mantras to each of the five A’s to make them even more powerful: Attention: I see you Appreciation: I value you Approval: I accept you Affection: I love you Allowing: I trust you I suggest that you say these each morning out loud to yourself while looking right into your eyes in the mirror. You’ll feel an energy shift by day 20—or even earlier. And in the future, you can judge the value of your relationships by whether or not these five A’s are present or absent.

Boys who have been shamed tend to act out, while girls turn their shame inward, often creating depression, eating disorders, or perfectionism.

I will protect my energy around draining people. I will learn how to set healthy boundaries. I will learn how to say “no” at the right times. I will listen to my intuition about the relationships that are nurturing for me. JUDITH ORLOFF, MD, THE EMPATH’S SURVIVAL GUIDE

In addition to the breathing meditation, here are some clearing techniques that are very effective. Find a few that work for you and do them with diligence. Wash your hands after your Reiki session and imagine that whatever you picked up is washing down the drain. Imagine you’re soaking your hands in a bucket of cool water. (This is very good right after a Reiki session if you can’t get the heat out of your hands.) Imagine that you’re breathing healthy, healing energy up from the ground and blowing the stale energy out through the top of your head or out of your mouth on the exhale. Imagine that a golden hoop goes over your head and down to your toes. Visualize that everywhere it touches, it takes negative energy out and replaces it with light. When it touches the ground, let the ground reabsorb it. (You can also go from the ground up to the sky.) Take a bath with sea salt or Epsom salts. Lavender and rosemary are good herbs to clear energy. You can add them right to your bathwater. Take a shower and imagine that the water is also clearing any negative energy with it. Smudge yourself by burning sage or incense. Clear your Reiki space often using this method. You can also use sage spray. I use sage spray on each client, the room, and myself at the end of a Reiki session. Kneel on the ground and then slowly lower your forehead to the ground in “child’s pose” from yoga. (This is great for emptying out the heart and clearing the third eye.) Spend time in nature. Fresh air and sunlight are highly beneficial. It’s best if you can get into the woods. Exercise—any kind is good. Breathing and sweating are great ways to clear yourself. Sit in a sauna or steam room. Meditate and engage in other spiritual practices. Give or receive some Reiki!

When you interact with a negative person, it is best to respond instead of reacting. Simply put, be the bigger person. If they yell, call you names, or criticize you, take a moment to either respond calmly or simply walk away. Choosing the high road will prevent you from stooping to their level and allowing them to drain your energy. This will also help you stay in control of your emotions and the situation. Understand You Can’t Change Them

If you feel that you can strengthen your vibes on your own without any support, you’re kidding yourself. Empaths and intuitives especially need supportive people to help us remain true to ourselves. We can easily get lost in other people’s energy and become drained, overwhelmed, and confused. I encourage you to actively seek out your soul supporters (those other six-sensory people who are listening to their spirit) as part of your effort to strengthen your inner channel. Find people you can connect with, who will listen to you, respect your vibes, and keep them safe and protected from negative judgment, including your own—in other words, your team. These people do exist, and you need to connect with and invite them into your life as fast as possible. Intuitive people are most comfortable with kindred spirits—we don’t do as well alone. As I like to say, even Jesus Christ picked 12 helpers before he went to work.

They are always tired; because they are so exposed to other people's energy, they constantly feel drained and tired. This tiredness is so extreme that even sleep can’t relieve it. Empaths are often diagnosed with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME). They suffer from back problems and digestive disorders. The center of the abdomen is where the solar plexus chakra is located (see chapter 10). Empaths feel the emotions of others in this area, which weakens it and can lead to irritable bowel syndrome, stomach ulcers, and lower back problems. The empath who doesn’t understand their gift will typically suffer from such physical problems. They catch illnesses quickly; an empath develops the physical symptoms of those around them. They often catch the flu, eye infections, and aches and pains in the body and joints. When they are close to someone who is unwell, they often experience sympathy pains.

The more you attempt to talk through things or work it out, the more you will be drained; the more frustrated, anxious, despairing, depressed, and unhinged you will feel. Manipulative individuals don’t suddenly become genuine – you have to give up that fantasy. What inevitably happens is that a variety of increasingly convoluted tools and tactics will be used to confuse you and get their way.

However, neuroplasticity and change are contingent on one thing: willingness. You will never get any sustainable and positive changes in your brain unless you, yourself, are willing to change something. The Cluster B person has to want to change. And the chances of that happening are basically zero. So, yes, it’s technically possible, but it is highly, extremely, overwhelmingly, tremendously, crushingly improbable. Remember, they are born this way. Just as you didn’t choose to be born as an empath, they didn’t choose to be born with their personality. So the goal here isn’t to judge them as evil or try to fix them. It is simply to avoid them, or at the very least, set up very healthy boundaries, and save yourself.

You also need to accept that your partner will never be able to meet your need to feel safe and loved. They may be perfectly pleasant some of the time, but all too often they will make you feel down, depressed, and drained. Be realistic and look to other sources for acceptance and love.

Remember that Darkness feeds on your fear and anger, so stop feeding it.

illness is actually a learned physiological response to specific stressors.