Dana Quotes

What's that Einstein quote about expecting different results from the same person? I shouldn't feel bad - I'm here, aren't I, I'm not the parent who didn't even text. Or the one who locked themselves in their bedroom half of Christmas. Talking like this, it's become clear that we are the main parts. This has all been about us, the sisters. I hadn't realised. I tell my mouth not to share these thoughts and Dana offers me another cigarette.

Znala je da će dio nje zauvijek ostati s njim. Tamo gdje su onoga dana stali, ostao je njegov ponos, njen inat, prokockana šansa i jedno obećanje. Imali su sve, a izabrali su ništa.....

My heart is yours, Hazel Sinnett," Jack said. "Forever. Beating or still.

They're just words. And words alone don't really mean anything. It's what you feel and what you believe when you say them that matter.

I have a theory that as long as you have one good friend, one real friend, you can get through anything.

It was an impossible situation, a trick of society as a whole: force women to live at the mercy of whichever man wants them but shame them for anything they might do to get a man to want them.

Her grief still burdened her, and she knew she would bear it the rest of her days.

Ovih dana mi, doduše, svi govore da im djelujem nekako umorno, ali ti znaš da je to kod mene pobrkano kao instalacije u ruskom soliteru, i da retko pokazujem ono što stvarno osećam, vrag da me nosi...

I figured we'd be too busy running for our lives than for him to make a move anyway. (Dana)

Our job on earth isn't to criticize, reject, or judge. Our purpose is to offer a helping hand, compassion, and mercy. We are to do unto others as we hope they would do unto us.

there was an assumption that I was personally attacking Sarah Palin by impersonating her on TV. No one ever said it was 'mean' when Chevy Chase played Gerald Ford falling down all the time. No one ever accused Dana Carvey or Darrell Hammond or Dan Aykroyd of 'going too far' in their political impressions. You see what I'm getting at here. I am not mean and Mrs. Palin is not fragile. To imply otherwise is a disservice to us both.

There are days when I think I don't believe anymore. When I think I've grown too old for miracles. And that's right when another seems to happen.

Someone should tell you you're beautiful every time the sun comes up. Someone should tell you you're beautiful on Wednesdays. And at teatime. Someone should tell you you're beautiful on Christmas Day and Christmas Eve and the evening before Christmas Eve, and on Easter. He should tell you on Guy Fawkes Night and on New Year's, and on the eigth of August, just because.

When you put four Alaskans into a room, you have five marriages, six divorces, and seven political parties.

She means it doesn't come off, Dana... The black. She means the devil with people who say you're anything but what you are.

Of course,it had to be just a rebound thing. There was no way I was interested in this arrogant, obnoxious jerk. No matter how hot he might be.

My beating heart is still yours, the letter said, and I’ll be waiting for you.

Theano: Always expecting the worst, you are. Danae: If you expect terrible things, then they don't surprise you, and all good things are like wonderful gifts.

Čemu bi uopšte život trebalo da vodi? Kad već hoćeš da čuješ šta mislim o tome, reći ću ti: samo bez aplauza, molim! Neću da utucam ovaj svoj životić u nekom nreperstanom čekanju. Šta radiš celog bogovetnog dana, samo nešto čekaš? Platu, večeru, proleće, letovanje, zimu, da provri ručak, da se ugreje peć, maturu, pa fakultet, pa muža, pa decu, pa unuke, pa kišu, pa sunce, pa da prestane vetar, pa da otplatiš kredit, pa da ti se očiste dosadni gosti iz kuće, pa da poče predstava, da počne neka televizijska masaža – i šta si radio? Ništa! Neprestano si nekog đavola čekao i on je stvarno stigao jednog dana, taj đavo, mislim, ali sorry, bilo je već kasno. Hoću da mi se sve dešava odmah. Evo sada! Hoću da ćutim i slušam muziku koja mi se dopada i da nipta ne čekam, već samo da postojim, tako nekako – da osećam ruke, noge, zube, nepce, kosu; jednom rečju oću da baš sad živim, ako si razumeo šta oću da kažem?

Woman is made of fragile glass; but do not put her to the test to see if she will break, for that might come to pass. She is too apt to shatter, and wisdom is surely ended if what can ne'er be mended is put in the way of danger. What I say to you is true, and let us all agree : wherever Danae may be, showers of gold are there, too.

Mi smo ničiji. Uvijek smo na nekoj međi, uvijek nečiji miraz. Vjekovima mi se tražimo i prepoznajemo, uskoro nećemo znati ko smo. Živimo na razmeđu svjetova, na granici naroda, uvijek krivi nekome. Na nama se lome talasi istorije kao na grebenu. Otrgnuti smo, a neprihvaćeni. Ko rukavac što ga je bujica odvojila od majke pa nema više ni toka, ni ušća, suviše malen da bude jezero, suviše velik da ga zemlja upije. Drugi nam čine čast da idemo pod njihovom zastavom jer svoju nemamo. Mame nas kad smo potrebni, a odbacuju kad odslužimo. Nesreća je što smo zavoljeli ovu svoju mrtvaju i nećemo iz nje, a sve se plaća pa i ova ljubav. Svako misli da će nadmudriti sve ostale i u tome je naša nesreća. Kakvi su ljudi Bosanci? To su najzamršeniji ljudi na svijetu, ni s kim se istorija nije tako pošalila kao sa Bosnom. Juče smo bili ono što danas želimo da zaboravimo, a nismo postali ni nešto drugo. S nejasnim osjećajem stida zbog krivice i otpadništva, nećemo da gledamo unazad, a nemamo kad da gledamo unaprijed. Zar smo mi slučajno tako pretjerano meki i surovi, raznježeni i tvrdi. Zar se slučajno zaklanjamo za ljubav kao jedinu izvjesnost u ovoj neodređenosti, zašto? Zato što nam nije svejedno. A kad nam nije svejedno znači da smo pošteni. A kad smo pošteni, svaka čast našoj ludosti !

What were miracles, but science that man didn’t yet understand? And didn’t that make it all the more miraculous that the secrets of the universe were out there, codes one might decipher if smart enough, tenacious enough?

Imao sam puno takvih dana u životu i pamtim ih samo po tome što sam ih zaboravio... Oni su kao slike u decijim farbankama koje ožive tek kad se oko njih potrudiš, i ja sam, kao i svi, preskocio mnogo stranica tragajuci za slikama koje cu lakše obojiti.

I had one friend with same-sex orientation, and Dana hadn't spoken to me since I asked her to describe her honeymoon in graphic detail—and then made vibrator noises.

Djeca ne smiju biti sama jer je samoća nešto odraslo; rastemo da bismo jednoga dana mogli ostati sasvim sami i da se zbog toga više nitko ne mora brinuti.

Ko je imao sreće da se jutros probudi u Beogradu, može se smatrati da je za danas dovoljno postigao u životu. Svako dalje insistiranje na još nečemu, bilo bi neskromno.

There's a cover for every pot, but I've never seen so many mismatched pots and covers in all my life. - Ellen Wasserfeldman, from Notes from Ellen Wasserfeldman by Alisa Dana Steinberg

So all you want is a kiss?" I asked. A little voice in my head said I was heading for one of those slippery slopes. I told the little voice to shut up. "Well, maybe more than one. But basically, yeah.

Some things you can fix, and some things you can’t. And I just think it is a shame to walk away from the things you can.

Hazel Sinnett, you are the most miraculous creature I have ever come across, and I am going to be thinking about how beautiful you are until the day I die.

Evo nas još jednom na početku.Danas ćemo ponovo uvežbavati kompletan program života. Da budemo spremni kad jednom počnemo da živimo

Will I have to use a litter box?" --Emma to Max after he just explained she'll be turning into a puma shifter The Wallflower (Halle Pumas Book 1)

Don't sound so grumpy. Next thing you know you'll be whinning and giving me puppy dog eyes.

There are always women behind the scenes, pulling the strings, Hazel. We are invisible to history, but we also survive.

He who dares to teach must never cease to learn.

Ako hoćeš da budeš srećan jedan dan", kaže stara poslovica iz Gruzije, "onda se dobro napij! Ako želiš da budeš srećan godinu dana, zaljubi se u lepu ženu. Ali, ako hoćeš da budeš srećan celog života, onda pij dobro vino sa starim prijateljima!" - Možda se sreća sastoji u tome da na vreme prestanemo sa trkom za srećom? Da stignemo do života pre no što nam lekari zabrane pušenje, alkohol, hranu, kupanje, sunčanje i ljubav?

Where were they from originally? The Seabolts?" "I don't know, Idaho, Oklahoma, Iowa. One of those red-neck states with vowels on both ends." "You mean like Alaska?

We need more bodies, 'cause it's not looking enough like the last scene in Hamlet already. --Chopper Jim Chopin

Similar to a butterfly, I've gone through a metamorphosis, been released from my dark cocoon, embraced my wings, and soared!

There's no going back from what happened. You can go back and understand the past, but you can't go back and change it.

War...is ugly and brutalizing, and the nobility is in doing it without becoming ugly and brutalizing.

When there's something or someone, when there's anything that makes you happy, you don't let a continent or an ocean or an empty pocket keep you apart

My brother, he says. My brother is dead. "And again he asks me to kill him. One more time before he falls to his knees and sobs. And i get it. I do. Because i have a brother too.

It's easy to fall in love among the winding cobblestone streets and snow-covered castles of Prague, but is it a good idea?

The room was a compact, informal library. Books stood or were stacked on the shelves that ran along two walls from floor to ceiling, sat on the tables like knickknacks, trooped around the room like soldiers. They struck Malory as more than knowledge or entertainment, even more than stories or information. They were colour and texture, in a haphazard yet somehow intricate decorating scheme. The short leg of the L-shaped room boasted still more books, as well as a small table that held the remains of Dana's breakfast. With her hands on her hips, Dana watched Malory's perusal of her space. She'd seen the reaction before. 'No I haven't read them all, but I will.And no I don't know how many I have. Want coffee?' Let me just ask this. Do you ever actually use the services of the library?' Sure, but I need to own them. If I don't have twenty or thirty books right here, waiting to be read, I start jonesing. That's my compulsion.

Kakvi smo mi to ljudi? Kakav smo mi to narod?... Između Azije i Evrope, na granici vera, carstava, ginuli smo nerazumno, više za druge nego za sebe... i ne stekosmo ni jednog vernog prijatelja. Taj nesrećni i prokleti srpski narod! U Evropi smo danas jedina država koja nema nijednog istinskog prijatelja. Nijednog! Ali nas Bog opet sačuva. Sačuva nas zbog nečeg. I za nešto.

Hello! Hunk getting naked time. You expected me not to look?

Being an idealist is not being a simpleton; without idealists there would be no optimism and without optimism there would be no courage to achieve advances that so-called realists would have you believe could never come to fruition.

When life gets hectic and you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to focus on the people and things you are most grateful for. When you have an attitude of gratitude, frustrating troubles will fall by the wayside.

Jebi ga prijatelju, volim je. Svakim danom sve više. Svakim danom je sve lepša, ima sve lepši osmeh, pogled. Volim kad obuče moj duks ili kad se ljuti samo da bih je poljubio, zaglio, mazio… Volim je druže, više od svog života. Zavolela me takvog kakav jesam, nije tražila da se promenim, a promenila me. Čuvam je, sigurna je, a opet joj pružam malo slobode, a puno ljubavi i razumevanja. Znaš, jednog dana bih voleo da je moje dete zove mama.

We each have the innate ability to heal ourselves. To empower ourselves with natural solutions, instead of succumbing to life-altering chemicals. There's a time and place for pharmaceuticals, but it shouldn't be the first answer, nor the only form treatment.

Takva je ljubav. Ona može da uništi čoveka, i nanovo ga podigne i preporodi. Danas može da voli mene, sutra tebe, a već sutra uveče nekog stranca, toliko je nestalna. Ali može i da bude čvrsta kao nesalomljiv pečat, može neugasivo da plamti do samrtnog časa.

I picked up my mocha and stood. The cup was still almost half-full, but I didn't want it anymore. Besides, it was now luke-warm. Which meant I didn't have to worry if it was scalding him when I tossed the remains in Ethan's face.I think Finn might have craked a smileas he held the door open for me, but I wasn't sure.

She sort of had a mushroom childhood.' 'A what?' 'She was plunked down in the dark and fed a lot of bullshit.

Do you need an audience to create work, or does not having an audience liberate you and make you a truer artist?

And memory insists on pining For places it never went, As if life would be happier Just by being different.

Healing trauma involves tears. The tears release our pain. The tears are part of our recovery. My friend, please let your tears flow.

To be a writer is to embrace rejection as a way of life.

If Duncan was ever into men then he's been so far in the closet he's been living in Narnia.

Dance like no one is watching; email like it may one day be read aloud in a deposition.

The issue isn't, Am I good enough? No. The issue is, Do I not have any other choice? Will and desire don't matter. Ability doesn't matter. Need is the only thing that matters.

there’s no hell worse than a world in which I would see you grow old and lose you and then be forced to live another day.

Sometimes things happen. Things happen even when you don't intend them to happen. Maybe at the beginning you had good intentions, or intentions you thought were harmlessm but before you knew it things got out of your control.

It's not the substance of what you make known to me that's beautiful; it's the opening of your heart. It is the 'yes' in your heart to be mine. The fact that you are revealing the secrets and letting me peer into your heart--that is in itself the beautiful part.

Dana had four beautiful eyes. She wore glasses. But her eyes were so beautiful that the glasses only made her prettier. With two eyes she was pretty. With four eyes she was beautiful. With six eyes she would have been even more beautiful. And if she had a hundred eyes, all over her face and her arms and her feet, why, she would have been the most beautiful creature in the world.

Želio bih umrijeti u sunčanom danu. Klicu te male tajne želje nosim u sebi od djetinjstva. Što me kod smrti najviše plaši, to je predstava mraka s kojom je ona skopčana. Divim se religijama Istoka, koje su uspjele da čovjeku dočaraju svijetlu, sunčanu smrt, da mu usade predstavu beskrajnog jása za grobom. One su, možda, učinile čovjeku najveće dobro koje se smrtniku može da učini. Želio bih umrijeti izvaljen nauzak na dobroj, vrućoj zemlji, sav u suncu i jásu, umrijeti u jedrini dana, u sat uzavrelih zrikavaca. U sat kad sanjivo šute povijena žita i nijemo bujaju oteščani grozdovi, u sat vrele podnevne tišine. Plaši me smrt u predvečerje, smrt u jesen, smrt iza kosih zavjesa kiše.

Trains tap into some deep American collective memory.

Dare to believe that you make a significant difference in our world.

Your emotional state has a tremendous amount to do with sickness, health and well-being. For years, my husband and I lived on -- and because of -- hope. Hope continues to give me the mental strength to carry on.

Perhaps you could take only one book with you to read at the gardens. After all, you'll only be there for the afternoon." Hazel choked on her tea. "One book? One book? Now you're being absurd. What if I finish it? Or what if I find it impossibly dull, what then? What am I supposed to read if I either complete the book I brought or I otherwise discover it to be unreadable? It what if it no longer holds my attention? Someone could spill tea on it. There. Think of that. Someone could spill tea on my one book, and then I would be marooned. Honestly, Iona, you must use your head.

I found peace of mind when I walked away from small fights not worth fighting. I stopped fighting for people who gossiped about me. I stopped fighting for those who didn't respect me. I quit worrying about those who wouldn't value me for being me.

Svakoga dana pronalazio bi po koju zaboravljenu Uninu stvarčicu, iz koje bi ga nasmešeno gledale njene srneće oči. Kada je jedanput istresao madrac, pronašao je tri ukosnice, napukli češalj sa srebrnim zvezdama, četvrt čokolade punjene kokosom i do pola popušenu kutiju "Marlboroa". U kupatilu je otkrio ljubičasti ruž za usne i vatu. Fetišista! Je li to sve što ostaje posle ljubavi? I šta, uopšte, ostaje posle nje? Telefonski broj koji lagano bledi u pamćenju? Čaše sa ugraviranim monogramima ukradene u "Esplanadi". Posle ljubavi ostaje običaj da se belo vino sipa u te dve čaše, i da crte budu na istoj visini. Posle ljubavi ostaje jedan sto u kafani kod znaka "?" i začuđeni pogled starog kelnera što nas vidi sa drugima. Posle ljubavi ostaje rečenica: "Divno izgledaš, nisi se ništa promenila..." I: "Javi se ponekad, još imaš moj broj telefona." I neki brojevi hotelskih soba u kojima smo spavali ostaju posle ljubavi. Posle ljubavi ostaju tamne ulice kojima smo se vraćali posle ljubavi. Ostaju tajni znaci, ljubavne šifre: "Ako me voliš, započni sutrašnje predavanje sa tri reči koje će imati početna slova mog imena..." Ušao je u amfiteatar i kazao: "U našoj avangardi..." Poslala mu je poljubac. Posle ljubavi ostaje tvoja strana postelje i strah da će neko iznenada naići. Klak - spuštena slušalica kada se javi tuđi glas. Hiljadu i jedna laž. Posle ljubavi ostaje rečenica koja luta kao duh po sobi: "Ja ću prva u kupatilo!" - i pitanje: "Zar nećemo zajedno?" Ovaj put, ne. Posle ljubavi ostaju saučesnici: čuvari tajni koje više nisu nikakve tajne. Posle ljubavi ostaje laka uznemirenost kad u prolazu udahnem "Cabochard" na nekoj nepoznatoj, crnomanjastoj devojci. Prepune pepeljare i prazno srce. Navika da se pale dve cigarete, istovremeno, mada nema nikog u blizini. Fotografije snimljene u automatu, taksisti koji nas nikada nisu voleli ( "Hvala što ne pušite!" - a pušili smo), i cvećarke koje jesu. Posle ljubavi ostaje povređena sujeta. Metalni ukus promašenosti na usnama. Posle ljubavi ostaju drugi ljudi i druge žene. Posle ljubavi, ne ostaje ništa. Sranje...

Those who teach, must never cease to learn

I totally bought you as a girl," says Marisol. "I'll double check with Frances later, but by the sounds of things, you seem to have no balls.

I've learned enough this year to know that life may surprise you, but not usually in the ways you imagine.

Friends, I was pretty sure, lift their friends up; they don't weigh them down like a sack full of stones

Let him spend every night in the dirt if it meant getting his mornings with her.

The Little Drummer Boy" was playing in the background for what seemed like the third time in a row. I fought off an urge to beat that Little Drummer Boy seneless with his own drumsticks.

Guys don’t go for me. Period. I don’t distract them. They don’t sneak glances in my direction. They don’t think of me when I’m not standing right in front of them. I’m scenery. I’m background.

Healing is like an onion. As you process through one layer of trauma to release the pain and heal, a new layer will surface. One layer after another layer will bring up new issues to focus on. Pace yourself. Only focus on one layer at a time.

Radite svoj posao ne gledajući ni levo ni desno, ni iza sebe ni preda se, ali svoj cilj postavljajte visoko, i tražite malo od sveta oko sebe (što manje, to bolje!), ali mnogo od sebe i svoga dela. Uveren sam da je većina od nas od početka udarila sebi suviše malen i suviše blizak cilj, i da je više i bolje mogla od onoga što je želela da uradi i postigne. Želite mnogo, težite smelo i daleko i visoko, jer visoki ciljevi otkrivaju i umnogostručavaju snage u nama. Težite smelo ka savršenstvu velikih dela, a radite predano i strpljivo na ograničenim i mučnim pojedinostima bez sjajnog vidika, jevtinog samozadovoljstva i tašte veličine. Ciljevima svojim živite, a trosite se neštedimice na sivim i nevidljivim poslovima svakod dana i sata. Često pomišljajte da je život jači i svet bogatiji nego što mi to u svakom pojedinom trenutku možemo da sagledamo, i ne gubite iz vida da u svakom od nas ima nepoznatih mogućnosti, da u hodu stičemo snage. Hteti daleko i želeti mnogo, kad je reč o postavljanju nesebičnih ciljeva, nije greh, nije opasno. Pogrešno je i opasno udariti sebi suviše blisku metu, jer to znači izneveriti i sebe i druge, ostati dužan životu. Budite nepoverljivi i stvarni, strogi prema sebi pri izvođenju svake pojedinosti, skromni pri njihovoj oceni, ali kod postavljanja ciljeva budite hrabri i velikodušni, mislite smelo i gledajte daleko.

After the fog lifts and you awaken to the truth about abuse, the narcissist and flying monkeys will minimize the facts about what took place. They will discredit you. They will undermine your own perception. They will accuse you of being insane. Even if you took the time to explain yourself, they will cast all blame onto you.

Naše žizni proljeće je kratko, Znojno ljeto za njime sljeduje, Smutna jesen i ledena zima; Dan za danom vjenčaje se tokom, Svaki našom ponaosob mukom. Nema dana koji mi želimo, Nit blaženstva za kojim čeznemo; Ko će vjetar ludi zauzdati Ko l' pučini zabranit kipjeti Ko l' granicu želji naznačiti? S točke svake pogledaj čovjeka, Kako hoćeš sudi o čovjeku — Tajna čojku čovjek je najviša! Tvar je Tvorca čovjek izabrana: Ako istok sunce sv'jetlo rađa, Ako biće vri u luče sjajne, Ako zemlja priviđenje nije, Duša ljudska jeste besamrtna; Mi smo iskra u smrtnu prašinu, Mi smo luča tamom obuzeta.

As we, or mother Dana, weave and unweave our bodies, Stephen said, from day to day, their molecules shuttled to and fro, so does the artist weave and unweave his image. And as the mole on my right breast is where it was when I was born, though all my body has been woven of new stuff time after time, so through the ghost of the unquiet father the image of the unliving son looks forth. In the intense instant of imagination, when the mind, Shelley says, is a fading coal, that which I was is that which I am and that which in possibility I may come to be. So in the future, the sister of the past, I may see myself as I sit here now but by reflection from that which then I shall be.

I think about how we can’t always live in the moment because moments pass, and when we’re lucky, we have the kind of moments that we can’t help wanting to go back to. We think about them, remember how they felt, and when more time passes we tell stories of these moments that are worth reliving.

We must come down from our heights, and leave our straight paths, for the byways and low places of life, If we would learn truths by strong contrasts; and in hovels, in forecastles, and among our own outcasts in foreign lands, see what has been wrought upon our fellow-creatures by accident, hardship, or strife.

IT’S THE LESSON YOUNG GIRLS EVERYWHERE were taught their entire lives—don’t be seduced by the men you meet, protect your virtue—until, of course, their entire lives depended on seduction by the right man. It was an impossible situation, a trick of society as a whole: force women to live at the mercy of whichever man wants them but shame them for anything they might do to get a man to want them. Passivity was the ultimate virtue. Heaven forbid you turn into someone like Hyacinth Coldwater. Be patient, be silent, be beautiful and untouched as an orchid, and then and only then will your reward come: a bell jar to keep you safe.

-Ima, međutim, nešto čudno u celoj toj legendi, Gubelkijane. Jeste li zapazili? Jeste li primetili da nema značaja što je odmereni Dedalus preživeo. Mit danas priznaje promašenog letača, krilatog Ikarusa, samo njega. Dobri zanatlija Dedalus je zaboravljen. Zanemaren nepravedno, no bez priziva. A, znate li zašto, Gubelkijane? Ja mislim zato što je, onako trezven i naučno bojažljiv, priznao jednu tuđu, naturenu granicu , što se slepo i ropski držao unutrašnjosti kruga koji nam je određen, što je izneverio i proigrao šansu da iz njega izađe, što je pokazao da je i suviše malo čovek, da bi bio bog. Razmislite o tome, ima u toj prokletoj legendi nekog naravoučenija. I budite mi zdravo!

Sometimes things happen. Things happen even when you don't intend them to happen. Maybe at the beginning you had good intentions, or no intentions, or intentions you thought were harmless, but before you knew it things got out of control. ...Sometimes things take on a life of their own. You become powerless. There is nothing you can do to stop certain things from happening.

I vow that from this day forward you shall not walk alone. My strength is your protection, my heart is your shelter, and my arms are your home. I shall serve you in all those ways that you require. I pledge to you my living and my dying, each equally in your care. Yours is the name I whisper at the close of each day and the eyes into which I smile each morning. I give you all that is mine to give. My heart and my soul I pledge to you. You are my Chosen One, you are my mate, and you are bound to me for eternity.

But here's something that I know about friendship: Sometimes the right thing to do is to not point out that your friend hasn't touched her chicken fingers or French fries and not point that maybe she's just overreacting. Instead, you just smile and sit with her and say, "I understand" when really, you don't understand her at all.

His is one of those cases which are more numerous than those suppose who have never lived anywhere but in their own homes, and never walked but in one line from their cradles to their graves. We must come down from our heights, and leave our straight paths for the by-ways and low places of life, if we would learn truths by strong contrasts; and in hovels, in forecastles, and among our own outcasts in foreign lands, see what has been wrought among our fellow-creatures by accident, hardship, or vice.

But no matter what happens, the earth keeps turning. Monday always comes and eventually, sometimes excruciatingly slowly, that Monday is followed by a Friday. You take tests, hand in papers you wrote at two in the morning the day they were due, and your shoes get worn out, and the pollen in the air increases so that you go through an entire package of tissues during the SATs, and you wander through the crowds at parties looking for Natalie Banks because you came with her, and you watch her take off for the backyard with a senior who seems to be in the backyard with a different girl at every party, and you learn to play chess with your dad, and you eat too much ice cream, and your favorite television drama has its two-hour season finale, and then suddenly the school year ends and you pack your bags for Tennessee.

An educational strategy to help you maintain your clear boundaries is the JADE technique. JADE is an acronym and it stands for: J = Justify: Don’t try to justify yourself to toxic people. It’s unproductive. A = Argue: Do not waste your energy arguing with toxic people. D = Defend: Don’t waste your breath trying to defend yourself to those who don’t care. E = Explain: Never explain yourself, especially to those who discredit you. The goal of the JADE technique is to take back your power. To stand up for yourself without needing to defend or explain yourself. It’s essential to not engage in this ridiculous mind-game with abusive people.

Ne zanima me od čega živiš. Želim znati za čim žudiš i imaš li hrabrosti snivati o ispunjenju želja srca svoga. Ne zanima me koliko ti je godina. Želim znati jesi li spreman riskirati ispasti budala zbog ljubavi, zbog svojih snova, zbog ove pustolovine koju nazivamo životom. Ne zanima me koji planeti djeluju na tvoj mjesec. Želim znati jesi li stigao do središta vlastite boli, jesu li te životna razočarenja otvorila ili si se skrutio i zatvorio od straha da ponovo ne osjetiš bol. Želim znati jesi li u stanju trpjeti bol, moju ili svoju, a da je pritom ne moraš skrivati ili ublažavati ili izbrisati. Želim znati znaš li se radovati, zbog mene ili sebe, i možeš li divlje zaplesati i pustiti da te ekstaza preplavi sve do vrškova prstiju, a da nas pritom ne upozoravaš neka budemo pažljivi, realni, svjesni ljudskih ograničenja. Ne zanima me je li priča koju mi pričaš istinita. Želim znati jesi li spreman razočarati drugoga kako bi bio iskren prema sebi; jesi li spreman podnijeti optužbe za izdaju, a pritom ne iznevjeriti sebe: možeš li biti izdajica i samim time vrijedan povjerenja. Želim znati jesi li u stanju vidjeti ljepotu, pa i ako nije lijepa, svakoga dana, i možeš li svoj život nadahnjivati Njezinom prisutnošću. Želim znati jesi li dovoljno snažan živjeti s neuspjehom, svojim i mojim, i da svejedno stojiš na rubu jezera i ushićeno vičeš prema srebrnom punom mjesecu: "To!" Ne zanima me gdje živiš i koliko novaca imaš. Želim znati jesi li sposoban ustati, nakon noći ispunjene tugom i očajem, umoran i do kostiju izubijan, i učiniti sve što je potrebno kako bi nahranio svoju djecu. Ne zanima me koga poznaješ i kako si dospio ovamo. Želim znati hoćeš li i dalje sa mnom stajati u žaru vatre i ne posustajati. Ne zanima me gdje si ili što ili s kim si studirao. Želim znati što te u tebi samom gura naprijed u trenucima kad se sve ostalo ruši. Želim znati možeš li biti sam sa sobom i voliš li uistinu osobu koja jesi u trenucima praznine.

I am thirty-five years old, and it seems to me that I have arrived at the age of grief. Others arrive there sooner. Almost no one arrives much later. I don’t think it is years themselves, or the disintegration of the body. Most of our bodies are better taken care of and better-looking than ever. What it is, is what we know, now that in spite of ourselves we have stopped to think about it. It is not only that we know that love ends, children are stolen, parents die feeling that their lives have been meaningless. It is not only that, by this time, a lot of acquaintances and friends have died and all the others are getting ready to sooner or later. It is more that the barriers between the circumstances of oneself and of the rest of the world have broken down, after all—after all that schooling, all that care. Lord, if it be thy will, let this cup pass from me. But when you are thirty-three, or thirty-five, the cup must come around, cannot pass from you, and it is the same cup of pain that every mortal drinks from. Dana cried over Mrs. Hilton. My eyes filled during the nightly news. Obviously we were grieving for ourselves, but we were also thinking that if they were feeling what we were feeling, how could they stand it? We were grieving for them, too. I understand that later you come to an age of hope, or at least resignation. I suspect it takes a long time to get there.

I wondered if my life was going to be one immersion after another, a great march of shallow, unpopular popular culture infatuations that don't really last and don't really mean anything. Sometimes I even think maybe my deepest obsessions are just random manifestations of my loneliness or isolation. Maybe I infuse ordinary experience with a kind of sacred aura to mitigate the spiritual vapidity of my life....no, it is beautiful to be enraptured. To be enthralled by something, anything. And it isn't random. It speaks to you for a reason. If you wanted to, you could look at it that way, and you might find you aren't wasting your life. You are discovering things about yourself and the world, even if it is just what you find beautiful, right now, this second.

No one has ever told me that I'm beautiful before," Hazel said. She hadn't realized it was true until she said it out loud. Jack stood with his hands on either side of her face and stared at her for a few heartbeats. Then he leaned in and softly kissed both her eyelids. "Someone should tell you that you're beautiful every time the sun comes up. Someone should tell you you're beautiful on Wednesdays. And at teatime. Someone should tell you you're beautiful on Christmas Day and Christmas Eve and the evening before Christmas Eve, and on Easter. He should tell you on Guy Fawkes Night and on New Year's, and on the eighth of August, just because." He kissed her lips once more, gently, and then pulled away and gazed into her eyes. "Hazel Sinnett, you are the most miraculous creature I have ever come across, and I am going to be thinking about how beautiful you are until the day I die.

Harper, I..." You don't have to say it." I don't?" I know." You know what?" I lean against him, nestling in the crook of his arm. I talk into his neck. I don't need to be able to see to find the parts of him I know. That morning in the trailer, when we had it to ourselves, and you made me breakfast, I wondered whether you would tell me you loved me, if you'd ever tell me, and I looked at you, and I thought you were going to say it, but instead you went off on a tangent about boysenberry jam." And?" And it was funny. And it was close enough to the real thing for me. Just sitting there with you like that." Boysenberry jam?" Boysenberry jam." Harper," he whispers into my hair. Yeah?" I boysenberry jam you.

Ako ti jave da sam pao na razoranim, sleđenim poljima Flandrije, da me je pokosio šrapnel - ti nemoj da budeš tužna i nemoj plakati pred svijetom, jer vrlo dobro znaš da iz mojih grudi ne mogu da niknu suncokreti niti se moje kapi krvi mogu pretvoriti u makove. To je sve jedna obična literarna konstrukcija, a da ne pričamo o tome što ja nikad nisam ni vidio Flandriju niti je ona vidjela mene. Ako ti kažu da sam se u svojim posljednjim časovima junački držao, da sam neustrašivo gledao smrti u oči, da sam je čak i začikavao, da sam svog sudiju prezrivo pljunuo, a da sam dželatu dao kesu dukata uz riječi: "Dobro obavite svoj posao!", a da sam, potom, sam izmaknuo stolicu ispod vješala, ti bi morala znati da je to jedna obična izmišljotina, izmišljotina onih koji ne znaju šta je to život a šta smrt znači. Ti me dobro znaš: znaš kako ja često umirem svakog bogovjetnog dana, kako se trzam na svaki šum, kako mi se čelo često orosi znojem (reklo bi se bez razloga), znaš da se bojim proviriti kroz špijunku na vratima bojeći se ne znam ni sam čega, bojeći se nekoga ko će mi s nadmoćnim osmijehom na licu izrecitirati sti­hove Marine Cvetajeve: Predaj se! Još niko nije našao spasa od onoga što uzima bez ruku! Sjećaš se kako sam se bojao kad si trebala da me predstaviš svo­jim roditeljima, koliko ti je trebalo vremena da me ubijediš da nisam baš toliki kreten koliki izgledam, da se ponekad sa mnom može proći ruku pod ruku kroz prometnu ulicu... Ja pamtim ono veče kad smo otišli kod jedne tvoje prijateljice koja je slavila rođendan, sjećam se svakog vica koji sam ispričao i sjećam se pogleda društva koje je u meni gledalo neku egzotičnu životinju, sjećam se kako su se gurkali laktovima kad smo ulazili, kad sam skidao svoje cipele sa pačijim kljunom (a u modi su bile brukserice), kako sam ispod stola krio onu rupu na ne baš čistim čarapama... Pamtim kako sam to veče, ponesen strahom, popio tri flaše "Fruškogorskog bisera", litar i po domaće rakije (više je nije bilo) i završio sa "Mandarmetom", nekim likerom od mandarina... Od svega toga bi se napilo jedno omanje krdo slonova, ali ja sam bio najtrezniji, bojao sam se da tebi ne napravim neko sranje i to me je držalo. Onda smo izašli na Vilsonovo šetalište i ti si se propela na prste i poljubila me, evo, baš ovdje, pored uha, a ja sam morao da sjed­nem na klupu i da počnem plakati... Prolazila su neka djeca i čuo sam ih kako kažu: "Vidi pedera!!!" Kao i uvijek, ti si me pitala šta mi je najednom, a ja nisam mogao da ti objasnim da to uopšte nije najednom, da je to stalno, da je to neka vrsta mog zaštitnog znaka, nešto po čemu bih sebe poznao među hiljadama meni sličnih, nešto što se i ne trudim da sakrijem, jedan zloćudni tumor s kojim sam se rodio, tumor na mozgu i duši koji se ne da ukloniti nikakvim operativnim putem ni zračenjem, ni činjenicom da te volim i da ti voliš mene... Ako ti jave da večeras hodam po kafanama i olajavam tebe i našu ljubav, da se prodajem za loše vino, da skupljam opuške tuđih simpatija, ljubim ruke nečistih konobarica, ispadam budala u svačijim očima... To ti je živa istina.