Daft Wullie Quotes

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Whut's the plan, Rob?" said one of them. "Okay, lads, this is what we'll do. As soon as we see somethin', we'll attack it. Right?" This caused a cheer. "Ach, 'tis a good plan," said Daft Wullie.
Terry Pratchett (The Wee Free Men (Discworld, #30; Tiffany Aching, #1))
She folded her arms and then shouted, "Right you thieving scunners! How dare you steal Miss Treason's funeral meats!" "Oh, waily, waily, it's the foldin' o' the arms, the foooldin' o' the aaaarmss!" cried Daft Wullie, dropping to the ground and trying to cover himself with leaves. Around him Feegles started to wail and cower and Big Yan began to bang his head on the rear wall of the dairy.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35; Tiffany Aching, #3))
And he won her freedom by playing beautiful music,' Roland added. 'I think he played a lute. Or maybe it was a lyre.' 'Ach, weel, that'll suit us fine,' said Daft Wullie. 'We're experts at lootin' an' then lyin' aboot it.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35; Tiffany Aching, #3))
Daft Wullie had raised a finger. 'Point o' order, Rob,' he said, 'but it was a wee bittie hurtful there for you to say I dinna hae the brains of a beetle...' Rob hesitated, but only for a moment. 'Aye, Daft Wullie, ye are right in whut ye say. It was unricht o' me to say that. It was the heat o' the moment, an' I am full sorry for it. As I stand here before ye now, I will say: Daft Wullie, ye DO hae the brains o' a beetle, an' I'll fight any scunner who says different!
Terry Pratchett (A Hat Full of Sky (Discworld, #32; Tiffany Aching, #2))
Aye, Rob, but we canna help noticin' ye also have tae do the Explainin', too,' said Daft Wullie. There was a general nodding from the crowd. To Feegles, Explaining was a dark art. It was just so HARD. 'Like, when we come back from drinkin', stealin', and fightin', Jeannie gives ye the Pursin' o' the Lips,' Daft Wullie went on. A moan went up from all the Feegles: 'Ooooh, save us from the Pursin' o' the Lips!' 'An' there's the Foldin' o' the Arms,' said Wullie, because he was even scaring himself. 'Oooooh, waily, waily, waily, the Foldin' o' the Arms!' the Feegles cried, tearing at their hair. 'Not tae mention the Tappin' o' the Feets...' Wullie stopped, not wanting to mention the Tappin' o' the Feets. 'Aargh! Oooooh! No' the Tappin' o' the Feets!' Some of the Feegles started to bang their heads on trees.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35; Tiffany Aching, #3))
I dinna like this, Rob,' said a Feegle. 'It's too quiet.' 'Aye, Slightly Sane Georgie, it is that-' 'You are my sunshine, my only su-' 'Daft Wullie!' snapped Rob, without taking his eyes off the strange landscape. The singing stopped. 'Aye, Rob?' said Daft Wullie from behind him. 'Ye ken I said I'd tell ye when ye wuz guilty o' stupid and inna-pro-pre-ate behavior?' 'Aye, Rob,' said Daft Wullie. 'That wuz another one o' those times, wuz it?' 'Aye.
Terry Pratchett (A Hat Full of Sky (Discworld, #32; Tiffany Aching, #2))
Is somethin' wrong?" said Daft Wullie. "Aye!" snapped the kelda. "Rob willnae tak' a drink o' Special Sheep Liniment!" Wullie's little face screwed up in instant grief. "Ach, the Big Man's deid!" he sobbed. "Oh waily waily waily - " Will ye hush yer gob, ye big mudlin!" shouted Rob Anybody, standing up. "I am no' deid! I'm trying to have a moment o' existential dreed here, right? Crivens, it's a puir lookout if a man cannae feel the chilly winds o' Fate lashing aroound his nethers wi'out folks telling him he's deid, eh?
Terry Pratchett (A Hat Full of Sky (Discworld, #32; Tiffany Aching, #2))
I think he played a lute. Or maybe it was a lyre." "Ach, weel, that’ll suit us fine," said Daft Wullie. "We’re experts at looting an’ then lyin’ aboot it.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35; Tiffany Aching, #3))
How're we gonna bring the big hag round?" said Big Yan. "I heard where ye has to put someone's heid between their legs," said Rob doubtfully. Daft Wullie sighed and drew his sword. "Sounds a wee bit drastic tae me," he said, "but if someone will help me hold her steady-
Terry Pratchett (A Hat Full of Sky (Discworld, #32; Tiffany Aching, #2))
Like, when we come back from drinkin’, stealin’, an’ fightin’, Jeannie gives ye the Pursin’ o’ the Lips,” Daft Wullie went on. A moan went up from all the Feegles: “Ooooh, save us from the Pursin’ o’ the Lips!” “An’ there’s the Foldin’ o’ the Arms,” said Wullie, because he was even scaring himself. “Oooooh, waily, waily, waily, the Foldin’ o’ the Arms!” the Feegles cried, tearing at their hair. “Not tae mention the Tappin’ o’ the Feets. . . .” Wullie stopped, not wanting to mention the Tappin’ o’ the Feets. “Aargh! Oooooh! No’ the Tappin’ o’ the Feets!” Some of the Feegles started to bang their heads on trees.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35))
Rob Anybody clearly noticed this, because he turned to his brother and said, “Ye will bring tae mind, brother o’ mine, that there was times when ye should stick your head up a duck’s bottom rather than talk?” Daft Wullie looked down at his feet. “Sorry, Rob. I couldna find a duck just noo.
Terry Pratchett (I Shall Wear Midnight (Discworld, #38))
And if they come in force, show them what the Feegles can dae!” Daft Wullie said, “I can play the harmonica.” Rob Anybody sighed. “Aye, weel, I suppose that puts the willies up me, so wud likely keep them awa’.
Terry Pratchett (The Shepherd's Crown (Discworld #41; Tiffany Aching #5))
As tae the rest o' ye, tak guard around yon stones. And if they come in force, show them what the Feegles can dae!" Daft Wullie said, "I can play the harmonica.
Terry Pratchett (The Shepherd's Crown (Discworld, #41; Tiffany Aching, #5))
But I reckon yon Wintersmith wants to romance the big wee hag and she disna ken what tae do aboot it.” “So it is like how babbies are made?” said Daft Wullie. “No, ’cuz even beasties know that but only people know aboot Romancin’,” said Rob. “When a bull coo meets a lady coo, he disna have tae say, ‘My heart goes bang-bang-bang when I see your wee face,’ ’cuz it’s kinda built intae their heads. People have it more difficult. Romancin’ is verra important, ye ken. Basically it’s a way the boy can get close to the girl wi’oot her attackin’ him and scratchin’ his eyes oot.
Terry Pratchett (Wintersmith (Discworld, #35))