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There’s a trick to the 'graceful exit.' It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, or a relationship is over — and let it go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its validity or its past importance to our lives. It involves a sense of future, a belief that every exit line is an entry, that we are moving up, rather than out.
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Ellen Goodman
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Closure
/klōZHər/ Noun
1. The thing women tell you what they want, but secretly they really want you to tell them why you don’t want them again, so they can try one last time to convince you that you were wrong.
2. The warped mentality that having someone tell you honestly why they don’t want you is going to somehow make you feel peace, so you can move on.
3. The neat packaging of finishing conversations because you have been stewing over it insecurely about the length of what a stalker does.
4. The one thing women don’t give themselves because if they didn’t care about the jerk they wouldn’t still be hanging onto another conversation that tells them what they already know: He just isn’t that interested in you.
5. The anal retentive art of perfecting every ending with meaning, rather than just excepting you went through something rather sucky and he doesn’t care.
6. The act of closing something with someone, when in reality you should slam the door.
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Shannon L. Alder
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This relationship affected you more than you are letting yourself believe. The ending hurt you more than you acknowledged, and you need to process that. Your continued interest in this person means there’s something about the relationship that is still unresolved, and it is probably some kind of closure or acceptance that you need to find for yourself.
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Brianna Wiest (The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery)
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It is important to understand that loving someone doesn’t always mean having a relationship with that person, just like forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation. Reconciling, in many cases, only sets us up for more abuse. A significant part of our healing will come in accepting that not reconciling with certain people is a part of life. There are some relationships that are so poisonous that they destroy our ability to be healthy and to function at our best. When we put closure to these relationships, we give ourselves the space to love our toxic family members from a distance as fellow human beings where we do not wish harm upon them; we simply have the knowledge and experience to know it is unwise to remain connected with them.
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Sherrie Campbell (But It's Your Family . . .: Cutting Ties with Toxic Family Members and Loving Yourself in the Aftermath)
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While their Ti pushes for closure, Ne counters by rallying for more options and alternatives. In many cases, Ne wins out, interjecting just enough new or contradictory information to keep INTPs in a state of indecision. Indeed, it is not uncommon for INTPs to feel entirely confident one day, only to feel ambivalent and uncertain the next.
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A.J. Drenth (The INTP: Personality, Careers, Relationships, & the Quest for Truth and Meaning)