Client Obsession Quotes

Clients come to acknowledge that their desire was never to be perfect; it was only to be loved. To simply be seen, accepted, and embraced without conditions is what the child, who is now an adult, has been obsessed with-not perfect.

Obsession, as I frequently told my clients, never affected outside situations. They only made your internal struggles—and resulting personal actions and decisions—worse.

On the other hand, children whose parents were not dependably attentive typically grow up to be adults with an insecure anxious attachment style, which means they tend to worry and obsess about relationships. They do not listen well because they are so concerned about losing people’s attention and affection. This preoccupation can lead them to be overly dramatic, boastful, or clingy. They might also pester potential friends, colleagues, clients, or romantic interests instead of allowing people their space.

Normally my clients were my mother, my grandmother, and my dad, and I would sell them the issues with a great color cover. There was a story I remember called ‘The Invader,’ and it had an invisible dome covering a city, with a giant tentacled monster eating everybody in sight, and people trying to drill a hole in the dome. And I did these epic Prismacolor pencil illustrations and sold out the three issues to my captive audience.

Finally, the superstars also shared a particular behavior, almost an intellectual and conversational tic: They loved to generate theories—lots and lots of theories, about all kinds of topics, such as why certain accounts were succeeding or failing, or why some clients were happy or disgruntled, or how different management styles influenced various employees. They were somewhat obsessive, in fact, about trying to explain the world to themselves and their colleagues as they went about their days. The superstars were constantly telling stories about what they had seen and heard. They were, in other words, much more prone to generate mental models. They were more likely to throw out ideas during meetings, or ask colleagues to help them imagine how future conversations might unfold, or envision how a pitch should go. They came up with concepts for new products and practiced how they would sell them. They told anecdotes about past conversations and dreamed up far-fetched expansion plans. They were building mental models at a near constant rate.

So, here is my definition of a codependent: A codependent person is one who has let another person’s behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behavior. The other person might be a child, an adult, a lover, a spouse, a brother, a sister, a grandparent, a parent, a client, or a best friend. He or she could be an alcoholic, a drug addict, a mentally or physically ill person, a normal person who occasionally has sad feelings, or one of the people mentioned earlier. But, the heart of the definition and recovery lies not in the other person—no matter how much we believe it does. It lies in ourselves, in the ways we have let other people’s behavior affect us and in the ways we try to affect them: the obsessing, the controlling, the obsessive “helping,” caretaking, low self-worth bordering on self-hatred, self-repression, abundance of anger and guilt, peculiar dependency on peculiar people, attraction to and tolerance for the bizarre, other-centeredness that results in abandonment of self, communication problems, intimacy problems, and an ongoing whirlwind trip through the five-stage grief process

But I haven’t mentioned the cheer relentlessness of modern life, the crowdedness, the incessant thumping music and braying voices, the near impossibility of finding solitude and silence and time to reflect. I haven’t mentioned the commercial pressures, the forces urging us to buy and discard and buy again. When everything in public life has a logo attached to it, when every public space is disfigured with advertisements, when nothing of public value and importance can take place without commercial sponsorship, when schools and hospitals have to act as if their guiding principle were market forces rather than human need, when adults and children alike are tempted to wear t-shirts with obscene words on them by the smirking little devices spelling the words wrongly, when citizens become consumers and clients; patients and guests, students and passengers are all flattened into customers, what price the school of morals? The answer is: what it would fetch in the market. And not a penny more. I haven’t mentioned the obsession with targets, and testing and tables; the management-driven and politics corrupted and all the clotted rubbish that so deforms the true work of schools. I haven’t mentioned something that might seem trivial but I think its importance is profound and rarely understood: that’s the difference between reading a story in a book and watching a story on a screen. It’s a psychological difference, not just a technical one. We need to take account of it and I fear we are not doing it, and the school of morals is suffering in result.

The thing I really like about Jase is that he’s as obsessed with ducks as I am. I rarely took my boys hunting with me when they were very young. In fact, I never took them when I was still an outlaw. “Not this time, boys, we might be running from the game warden,” I’d tell them. But after I repented and came to Jesus Christ, I started taking my sons hunting with me, beginning with Alan. Before we moved to where we live now, it was a pretty long haul from town to the Ouachita River bottoms. Alan got carsick nearly every time I took him hunting, but he didn’t think I knew. We stopped at the same gas station every time, and he’d walk around back and lose his breakfast before he climbed back into the truck. I was proud of him for never complaining. I took Jase hunting for the first time when he was five. He was shooting Pa’s heavy Belgium-made Browning twelve-gauge shotgun, which he could barely even hold up. It kicked like a mule! The first time Jase shot the gun, it kicked him to the back of the blind and flipped him over a bench. “Did I get him?” Jase asked. I knew right then that I had another hunter in the family, and Jase is still the most skilled hunter of all my boys. I trained Jase to take over the company by teaching him the nuances of duck calls and fowl hunting, and he is still the person in charge of making sure every duck call sounds like a duck. Not only did Jase design the first gadwall drake call to hit the market, he also invented the first triple-reed duck caller. Jase and I live to hunt ducks. We track ducks during the season through a nationwide network of hunters, asking how many ducks are in their areas and what movements are expected. Then we check conditions of wind and weather fronts that might influence duck movement. We talk it all over during the day and again each morning, before the day’s hunt, as we prepare to leave for the blind. When Kay and I began to ponder becoming less active in the Duck Commander business, we offered its management to Jase, who had been most deeply involved in the company. But he had no desire to get into management. Jase likes building duck calls and doesn’t really enjoy the business aspects of the company, like making sales calls or dealing with clients and sponsors. Like me, Jase is most comfortable when he’s in a duck blind and doesn’t care for the details that come with running a company. Jase only wants to build duck calls, shoot ducks, and spend time with his family (he and his wife, Missy, have three kids).

nor did he become obsessed with photography like so many other clients did, fussing with rolls and exposures until they did not seem to be seeing anything outside at all.

Think Casual. Do what Steve Jobs did: Shun the trappings of big business. Operating like a smaller, less hierarchical company makes everyone more productive—and makes it more likely that you’ll become a bigger business. Choreographed meetings and formalized presentations may transfer information from person to person, but they neither inspire nor bring a team closer together. Embrace the fact that you’ll get more accomplished when you converse with people rather than present to them. You’ll still have plenty of opportunities to dress up and do things the old-fashioned way. But internally, and on a day-to-day basis with your clients—deformalize. Many great creative ideas are actually born in these types of briefings, when key words or phrases emerge in conversation. Some of the agency’s most compelling words for Apple were generated this way. If you want to reap the benefits of Simplicity, think big—but don’t act that way. As Steve Jobs proved, one of the most effective ways to become a big business is to maintain the culture of a small business.

The obsession with quarterly earnings came about because personal compensation was increasingly tied to what happened to the share price. Improving market capitalization became the number one job for senior executives. Success would lead to personal wealth. Sadly,

He could mentally picture, in great detail, some of the grand, intricately detailed pastries and cakes Lani had constructed at Gateau. Her inspired creations had drawn raves. She hadn't been a Beard nominee during her first year of eligibility for nothing. She'd worked tirelessly to perfect even the tiniest detail, not because the client- or an awards committee- would have noticed, but because it mattered to her that each effort be her best. In fact, it was her work ethic and dedication that had first caught his attention. She wasn't a grandstander, like most with her natural ability, behaving in whatever manner it took to stick out and be noticed. She let her work speak for her. And speak it did. It fairly shouted, in fact. Once he'd noticed, he couldn't help being further captivated by how different her demeanor was from most budding chefs. Bravado, with a healthy dose of self-confidence bordering on arrogance, was a trademark of the profession. Some would say it was a requirement. Leilani's quiet charm, and what he'd come to describe as her relentless calm and ruthless optimism had made an indelible mark on him. She wasn't like any baker he'd ever met, much less any top-notch chef. She cared, she labored- hard- and she lived, breathed, ate, and slept food, as any great chef did. But she was never frantic, never obsessed, never... overwrought, as most great chefs were. That teetering-off-the-cliff verve was the atmosphere he'd lived in, thrived on, almost his entire life. Leilani had that same core passion in spades, but it resided in a special place inside her. She simply allowed it to flow outward, like a quietly rippling stream, steady and true. As even the gentlest flowing stream could wear away the sturdiest stone, so had Leilani worn down any resistance he'd tried to build up against her steady charm... and she'd done it without even trying.

As long as you are obsessed about what you want to achieve and flexible about how you get there, then you will give yourself the best chances of success.

These six facets can work optimally for you in pairs. Together, the facets of openness and curiosity tap your innate ability to live each day with a more creative, less reactive, mindset. These two facets are foundational, and in my experience with clients and students, they are perhaps the easiest among the six to begin tracking. Fostering the two facets of bewilderment and hope together can strengthen your resilience and fortitude in trying times. Because they can shift, if not transform, your view of the world or your life in beneficial ways, tracking these two facets can be profoundly rewarding. If you or someone you know is having hard times, start with these two. Together, when you track connection and admiration, you learn to shift your direction outward and deepen your relationships with others. This other-orientation makes them essential facets for our times.

One of my clients, a consultant who develops leadership potential in universities and nonprofits, once joked that he didn’t suffer from attention deficit disorder (ADD) but from “attention abundance disorder (AAD).” He didn’t lack curiosity, he said. His problem was that he wanted to rein in his curiosity and focus on fewer ideas. He’s not alone. I imagine curiosity often stepping in to do wonder’s bidding. First, wonder steps back and takes notice. It gets curiosity’s attention and says, “Psst. Look at this. What’s possible here?” Then curiosity takes off on a wild pursuit to learn more. After a while, curiosity dashes back home and empties its pockets of found objects and bits of knowledge on wonder’s table.

Obsession : « Qu'est-ce qu'on va penser de nous ? » (les voisins, les clients, tout le monde).

Another issue I often see with Bees (and Crickets for that matter) is the fear of disposing of items incorrectly. Again, this comes from perfectionism. I have had more clients than I can count obsess over the best place to recycle old electronics or torn and soiled used clothing. Everything from empty boxes to fabric scraps can be a huge stumbling block when they focus on the “right” and “perfect” way to dispose of something. Sometimes, the garbage really is the best option. It’s sad and wasteful, but holding onto garbage because you are afraid to put it in a landfill isn’t a long-term option.

businesses never lift off is because of an obsession with ‘little chores’. Little chores are things that keep you busy but don’t make you any money… or even worse, lose you money.

Obsessively reads Rockin Mama, Mamavation, and Reddit’ is defined and revealing.

Sally loves spending time reading stories and getting tips from other mums, and learning about parenthood in the Mothers of Melbourne Facebook group. It’s a much cherished pastime of hers. Her biggest frustration being a mother of two is simply that there is not enough hours in the day to do everything. When she’s in research mode, the first place she goes is Google on her iPad in the kitchen. She’s a frequent (kinda obsessive) visitor of mummy blogs like Rockin Mama and Mamavation. Her life-long dream is to start her own interior design business, so she can have a creative outlet and more ‘me time’. Last week when she was shopping at her local farmers market and browsing Instagram, an ad popped up with an invitation to download a new app for environmentally-friendly cleaning products’.

Express to the crowd your near obsession

A coaching session works like this: The coach asks the client to describe the greatest source of pain in his or her life. The client talks, the coach asks follow-up questions, and as soon as the coach forms an opinion, she discloses it to her client. The technique is meant to distinguish the life coach from a quiet, diffident therapist. 'The first thing I teach coaches to say is, 'Here's what I think is going on with you. Your job is to please, please tell me where I'm wrong and tell me precisely.' Asking for this confirmation, number one, it builds trust. Number two, it puts you in a position of servant rather than overseer. It creates humility and an open mind.

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Best Architects in Noida: My Real Story of Finding Someone Who Actually Listens I'm sitting in my living room right now, having my morning chai, and I'm looking at this wooden ceiling that my architect convinced me to add three years ago. Back then, I thought it was unnecessary. Today, I can't imagine my house without it. That's when I realized I need to write this because so many people in Noida are stuck in the same place I was—clueless about finding the best architects in Noida, thinking they're a luxury they can't afford, or worse, not knowing that working with the best architects in Noida can completely transform your living space. Finding the right architect in Noida changed everything for me, and I want to help others avoid my initial mistakes. My name is Rajesh Sharma. I'm a marketing manager in Gurgaon. In 2021, I decided to build a house in Noida for my family. I had ₹1 crore budget, a wife who had Pinterest obsession with Scandinavian designs, and absolutely zero clue how construction actually works. The contractor my brother-in-law recommended seemed nice enough. He said, "Raj bhai, you don't need architect. I've built 200 houses. I know what I'm doing." That's when my wife said, "Ask someone in the office about architects." Best decision we made. How I Ended Up Looking for Architects in Noida The first guy I called was terrible. He spoke to me like I was stupid, kept using terms like "structural integrity" and "load-bearing capacity" without explaining anything. He quoted ₹8 lakhs for what seemed like just drawing some plans. I thanked him and hung up thinking architects are overpriced middlemen. Then my colleague Priya mentioned her brother-in-law had recently done a house in Sector 77. She offered his number. We met him for coffee, not a formal consultation. He didn't have a laptop with him. He just asked me questions. Actual questions. "Rajesh, where do you spend most of your time at home?" "Do you work from home?" "Your wife mentioned she loves cooking—show me how she cooks." "How often do your parents visit?" I remember thinking this guy is weird. Why does he care where I cook? But something felt right. The Conversation That Changed My Approach His name is Vikram, and he's been designing houses in Noida for 18 years. Not just buildings. Houses. He understands the difference. He took me and my wife to a house he designed in Sector 95. We spent an hour there talking to the owners—a couple in their 50s. The wife said, "When we first moved in, we just sat in the living room for an hour. We didn't know where to sit first. Everything felt like it was made for us." I asked Vikram, "How much did they pay you?" He said, "For this house, about ₹5.5 lakhs. Their project cost them ₹85 lakhs. So about 6.5% of the total cost." I did the math. For my ₹1 crore budget, that's about ₹6.5-7 lakhs. Honestly, it still felt like a lot. But then Vikram told me something I'll never forget. "Rajesh, I've seen so many clients who saved my fees by not hiring an architect. You know how much they regretted it? All of them. One guy built a kitchen without thinking about ventilation. He can't use an exhaust fan at night because it's too loud and his bedroom is right above. He's lived with that mistake for 8 years." That hit differently. The First Meeting (And Why It Matters) We sat with Vikram in his small office in Sector 62. No flashy website. No 3D renderings on the wall. Just sketches, some photographs of completed projects, and actual coffee. He asked me to describe my ideal day in the new house. I felt stupid at first—like, isn't that the point of having a house? But as I described it, I realized I'd never actually thought about it deeply. Where do I read the newspaper? Where do I have my morning coffee? Where do I work on my laptop? Where do my friends sit when they visit? What time is the sun annoying in different rooms? Most architects would