Ciaphas Cain Quotes

regrets are a waste of good drinking time,

When in deadly danger, When beset by doubt, Run in little circles, Wave your arms and shout.

Losses are inevitable on the battlefield, of course, but in my view, no one’s expendable apart from the enemy; angry, resentful troopers aren’t going to cover my back when the las-bolts start flying,

Shouldn’t we try to help him?’ Simla asked. I shook my head, with as much reluctance as I could feign. ‘I wish we could,’ I lied.

The commissar’s always right,’ I said, smiling. ‘It says so in the regulations.

When in deadly danger, When beset by doubt, Run in little circles, Wave your arms and shout.

ʹI donʹt care how bloody sanctioned they are, a psykerʹs a psyker, and anything to do with the warp is more trouble than itʹs worth.ʹ ‐ General Karis

The Guard needed soldiers of that calibre, and if I had to bend a few regulations to keep them standing between me and whatever the warp might be about to vomit up at us, I’d make origami out of the rulebook without a second thought.

Colonel Kasteen called the meeting to order. Then she called it to order again. Major Broklaw fired his bolt pistol into the ceiling, and the meeting came to order.

readers wanting more detail are referred to Broedenour’s thirty-seven volume work Waaaagh! and Peace: The Siege of Perlia and its Neighbouring Systems. (Had the author of this magisterial work not been tragically killed by a toppling library stack before its completion it would undoubtedly be regarded as the definitive work on the subject. As it is, it remains an unsurpassed work of reference for anyone interested in the minutiae of the first nine weeks of the two-year campaign.)

You could just try being yourself, you know.’ The thought was terrifying. I’d spent so long hiding behind masks I was no longer sure there was a genuine Ciaphas underneath them any more, just a quivering little bundle of self-interest.

If you don’t expect gratitude you’ll seldom be disappointed.’ – Eyor Dedonki, Memoirs of a Pessimist. 479 M41

What did he do?’ I asked, curious in spite of myself, and Amberley shrugged, with the whining of servos I was beginning to become so familiar with. ‘Cracked under pressure. He ordered an entire platoon executed for failure to salute a superior officer in the middle of an artillery barrage, and shot seven troopers himself with his sidearm before he was brought down. Tragic.’ ‘It happens.’ I shrugged too. ‘Some junior officers just can’t take the pressure of combat. That’s why we have commissars.’ ‘He was a commissar,’ Amberley said, and I looked at the poor wretch with a curious amalgam of horror and pity.

Paranoia is a very comforting state of mind. If you think they’re out to get you, it means you think you matter.

You’re the expert,’ I said. ‘I’d just have told you to use your best judgement in any case.’ She nodded, seemingly relieved, and I swept my gaze around the rest of the little group. ‘And that goes for the rest of you too,’ I added. ‘Unless you’re faced with a decision which will affect our safety as a group, just get on with it.