Bastard Ex Husband Quotes

Because underneath her ex-husband’s charming, shining veneer lay a dark soul heavily marinated in ‘miserable bastard’.

Don’t cry Meg. It’s not that bad.” “It’s not that bad? Ha! I’m thirty years old, with two black eyes, a swollen nose, a big, honking, yellow knot on my forehead, and the haircut from hell. As if that isn’t enough, I had a transvestite in my bed this morning, my husband is a lying, cheating, cradle robbing, bastard, who at some point slept with my best friend.” Jack scooted over to the middle of the seat, and stopped listening to his head and wrapped his arms around her. Big mistake! From inside, four faces were pressed to the window. “My last orgasm-with a partner- was…hell I can’t remember when! I frequently knock myself out for entertainment purposes, I have little boobs, big feet, squishy panties, nosy neighbors and demon possessed fish. God hates me!” Jack held her tighter. “I have frequent flyer miles at the hospital. I fed my husband marijuana Ex-lax brownies and shoved a marble up his butt.” Jack pulled away to look at her and she was serious. And crying. Big, sad, alligator tears that made his heart swell. “My mother is a holy rolling, Catholic Dr. Ruth, complete with condoms and Rosary beads. I write about relationships and sex, both of which I suck at and I hired a Private Investigator to pimp me out.” Jack burst out laughing and she pushed him away and swatted his shoulder. “And now you’re laughing at me. Could things get any worse?

Once they were gone, Syn lifted his head to look at his Lieutenants. He knew how close he’d been to putting a bullet in that bastard’s head, because all he kept picturing were that man’s hands wrapped around Furi’s throat. Syn hadn’t lost control in a long time, and he wondered what that meant. How deep did his feelings for Furi run? “Go home,” Day said, clasping him on the shoulder. “We’ll handle the rogue bitch clan at the station.” “I can do my job, Day,” Syn snapped back at his boss. “We know that. We’ll let Sasha Pain; aka porn bitch sit on ice and interrogate her in the morning see if there’s any connection with this ex-husband and BTNS.” God gestured with his head. “Go check on your man, you know that’s where you want to be.” Syn was taken aback. God said nothing about him dating a prior suspect in a case they were still working, or about dragging them into a back alley fight while he took his revenge. God was actually being compassionate. Well, damn. Syn was astonished to see that side of him. “Besides, you won’t be worth shit to me with a hard on all night.” And he’s back. Well, that compassion sure was short-lived.