Authenticity Over Perfection Quotes

Presenting leadership as a list of carefully defined qualities (like strategic, analytical, and performance-oriented) no longer holds. Instead, true leadership stems from individuality that is honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed.... Leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection.

Well, I'm glad you're so amused," I said, running my fingers across the railing. Maxon hopped up to sit on the railing, looking very relaxed. "You're always amusing. Get used to it." Hmm. He was almost being funny. "So...about what you said...," he started tentatively. "Which part? The part about me calling you names or fighting with my mom or saying food was my motivation?" I rolled my eyes. He laughed once. "The part about me being good..." "Oh. What about it?" Those few sentences suddenly seemed more embarrassing than anything else I'd said. I ducked my head down and twisted a piece of my dress. "I appreciate you making things look authentic, but you didn't need to go that far." My head snapped up. How could he think that? "Maxon, that wasn't for the sake of the show. If you had asked me a month ago what my honest opinion of you was, it would have been very different. But now I know you, and I know the truth, and you are everything I said you were. And more." He was quiet, but there was a small smile on his face. "Thank you," he finally said. "Anytime." Maxon cleared his throat. "He'll be lucky, too." He got down from his makeshift seat and walked to my side of the balcony. "Huh?" "Your boyfriend. When he comes to his senses and begs you to take him back," Maxon said matter-of-factly. I had to laugh. No such thing would happen in y world. "he's not my boyfriend anymore. And he made it pretty clear he was gone with me." Even I could hear the tiny bit of hope in my voice. "Not possible. He'll have seen you on TV by now and fallen for you all over again. Though, in my opinion, you're still much too good for the dog." Maxon spoke almost as if he was bored, like he'd seen this happen a million times. "Speaking of which!" he said a bit louder. "If you don't want me to be in love with you, you're going to have to stop looking so lovely. First thing tomorrow I'm having your maids sew some potato sacks together for you." I hit his arm. "Shut up, Maxon." "I'm not kidding. You're too beautiful for your own good. Once you leave, we'll have to send some of the guards with you. You'll never survive on your own, poor thing." He said all this with mock pity. "I can't help it." I sighed. "One can never help being born into perfection." I fanned my face as if being so pretty was exhausting. "No, I don't suppose you can help it.

leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection.

But I took a deep breath, and she sat there listening to me across my dirty coffee table, and we talked about community and family and authenticity. It’s easy to talk about it, and really, really hard sometimes to practice it. This is why the door stays closed for so many of us, literally and figuratively. One friend promises she’ll start having people over when they finally have money to remodel. Another says she’d be too nervous that people wouldn’t eat the food she made, so she never makes the invitation. But it isn’t about perfection, and it isn’t about performance. You’ll miss the richest moments in life—the sacred moments when we feel God’s grace and presence through the actual faces and hands of the people we love—if you’re too scared or too ashamed to open the door. I know it’s scary, but throw open the door anyway, even though someone might see you in your terribly ugly half-zip.

All very ancient history, except that of the illuminated Jews, is a perfect fable. It was written by priests, or collected from their reports; and calculated solely to raise lofty ideas of the origin of each nation. Gods and demi-gods were the principal actors; and truth is seldom to be expected where the personages are supernatural. The Greek historians have no advantage over the Peruvian, but in the beauty of their language, or from that language being more familiar to us. Mango Capac, the son of the sun, is as authentic a founder of a royal race, as the progenitor of the Heraclidae. What truth indeed could be expected, when even the identity of person is uncertain? The actions of one were ascribed to many, and of many to one. It is not known whether there was a single Hercules or twenty.

beautifully illustrated what it means to live in authenticity: to acknowledge unpleasant feelings, like shame and humiliation, and give voice to them. She then asked someone she trusted to sit with her in her sadness — without smoothing over the negative feelings or brushing them away.

deceptive and can easily be an illusion. Indeed, the second type is experienced in all the faculties of our soul and cannot deceive those who truly love God; indeed they no more doubt it than they doubt God himself, for love drives out all fear. ‘Love knows no fear’ as St John12 (1 John 4:18) says, and it is also written: ‘Love covers a multitude of sins’ (1 Peter 4:8). For where there is sin, there can be neither complete trust nor love, since love completely covers over sins and knows nothing of them. Not in such a way as if we had not sinned, but rather it wipes them away and drives them out, as if they had never existed. For all God’s works are so utterly perfect and overflowing that whoever he forgives, he forgives totally and absolutely, preferring to forgive big sins rather than little ones, all of which creates perfect trust. I hold this kind of knowledge to be incomparably better, more rewarding and more authentic than the other, since neither sin nor anything else can obstruct it. For when God finds people in the same degree of love, then he judges them in the same way, regardless of whether they have sinned greatly or not at all. But those to whom more is forgiven, should have a greater love, as our Lord Jesus Christ said: ‘They to whom more is forgiven must love more’ (Luke 7:47).

We are meant to grow, to become the people we are created to be, to continually be moving forward in our faith. We are a work in progress. None of us is perfect. Fear tells us we must live a certain way or we will be judged, rejected, and possibly even abandoned altogether. So our focus is continually on ourselves. And for most of us, fear causes us to beat ourselves up over every little thing. When we believe fear, it keeps us from living authentic lives, lives meant to be a testimony of God’s grace and goodness.

I should know; perfectionism has always been a weakness of mine. Brene' Bown captures the motive in the mindset of the perfectionist in her book Daring Greatly: "If I look perfect and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame." This is the game, and I'm the player. Perfectionism for me comes from the feelings that I don't know enough. I'm not smart enough. Not hardworking enough. Perfectionism spikes for me if I'm going into a meeting with people who disagree with me, or if I'm giving a talk to experts to know more about the topic I do … when I start to feel inadequate and my perfectionism hits, one of the things I do is start gathering facts. I'm not talking about basic prep; I'm talking about obsessive fact-gathering driven by the vision that there shouldn't be anything I don't know. If I tell myself I shouldn't overprepare, then another voice tells me I'm being lazy. Boom. Ultimately, for me, perfectionism means hiding who I am. It's dressing myself up so the people I want to impress don't come away thinking I'm not as smart or interesting as I thought. It comes from a desperate need to not disappoint others. So I over-prepare. And one of the curious things I've discovered is that what I'm over-prepared, I don't listen as well; I go ahead and say whatever I prepared, whether it responds to the moment or not. I miss the opportunity to improvise or respond well to a surprise. I'm not really there. I'm not my authentic self… If you know how much I am not perfect. I am messy and sloppy in so many places in my life. But I try to clean myself up and bring my best self to work so I can help others bring their best selves to work. I guess what I need to role model a little more is the ability to be open about the mess. Maybe I should just show that to other people. That's what I said in the moment. When I reflected later I realized that my best self is not my polished self. Maybe my best self is when I'm open enough to say more about my doubts or anxieties, admit my mistakes, confess when I'm feeling down. The people can feel more comfortable with their own mess and that's needs your culture to live in that. That was certainly the employees' point. I want to create a workplace where everyone can bring the most human, most authentic selves where we all expect and respect each other's quirks and flaws and all the energy wasted in the pursuit of perfection is saved and channeled into the creativity we need for the work that is a cultural release impossible burdens and lift everyone up.

Authenticity is a collection of choices we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.” As I told more and more people, I realized that (a) they didn’t really care because everyone is too busy dealing with their own emotional problems to care about my emotional problems and (b) most had struggled with similar issues and felt relieved and inspired that I could be vulnerable about mine. When this happened, my fear of judgment lost its power over me. Maybe the road to being a decent role model wasn’t about being emotionally perfect, maybe it was about finding the courage to admit that I wasn’t.

So the question arose now, as it had in the wake of the Mongol holocaust: if the triumphant expansion of the Muslim project proved the truth of the revelation, what did the impotence of Muslims in the face of these new foreigners signify about the faith? With this question looming over the Muslim world, movements to revive Islam could not be extricated from the need to resurrect Muslim power. Reformers could not merely offer proposals for achieving more authentic religions experiences. They had to expound on how the authenticity they proposed would get history back on course, how their proposals would restore the dignity and splendor of the Umma, how they would get Muslims moving again toward the proper endpoint of history: perfecting the community of justice and compassion that flourished in Medina in the original golden moment and enlarging it until it included all the world. Many reformers emerged and many movements bubbled up, but all of them can sorted into three general sorts of responses to the troubling question. One response was to say that what needed changing was not Islam, but Muslims. Innovation, alterations, and accretions had corrupted the faith, so that no one was practicing the true Islam anymore. What Muslims needed to do was to shut out Western influence and restore Islam to its pristine, original form. Another response was to say that the West was right. Muslims had gotten mired in obsolete religious ideas; they had ceded control of Islam to ignorant clerics who were out of touch with changing times; they needed to modernize their faith along Western lines by clearing out superstition, renouncing magical thinking, and rethinking Islam as an ethical system compatible with science and secular activities. A third response was to declare Islam the true religion but concede that Muslims had certain things to learn from the West. In this view, Muslims needed to rediscover and strengthen the essence of their own faith, history and traditions, but absorb Western learning in the fields of science and technology. According to this river of reform, Muslims needed to modernize but could do so in a distinctively Muslim way: science was compatible with the Muslim faith and modernization did not have to mean Westernization.

I am a child of the everlasting King. I am forgiven. I am a warrior. I am cloaked in righteous armor. I was made for adventure. I was built for battle. I am part of a larger story. My true and lasting affirmation comes only from my King. I am unique above all creation--planned and perfect in design. I have been created for a glorious destiny. All my ways are established by you, my King, and I walk in them. My life and actions are real, authentic, and without compromise. I am quickened and made alive through the power of your Spirit. My whole life is before me. I am a shining gift from God to this lost world. I know my name, I understand my calling, and I am worthy to walk in it. I am strong, brave, and courageous in the face of my enemies. Whatever is good, whatever is pure, whatever is true, dwell on these things. My sins are scattered as far as the east is from the west. I am a good husband to my wife. I am a good father to my daughters. The past is over, and the future glimmers with radiant light. I will look to the new day, the dawning of hope. I will step forward with the truth before me and will no longer look on the day that is gone. The past is over; the future has begun.

Coley and I had to separate to get around a girl who was mostly eclipsed by the size of the power she was carrying some sort of project about World War II—a picture of Hitler doing his mustachioed Sieg heil, a gaunt concentration camp victim, a couple of American soldiers smoking cigarettes and scowling at the camera, the captions beneath each photo in glitter-bubble letters. If this had been the movie version of my life, I knew, somebody who did teenage stuff well, some director, would have lingered on that poster and maybe even have swelled some poignant music, out is in slow motion as the hallway continued on at regular speed around us, backlit the three of us—Coley and the poster board chick and me—and in doing so tried to make some statement about teenage frivolity and prom season as it stacked up against something authentic and horrible like war. But if renting all those movies had taught me anything more than how to lose myself in them, it was that you only actually have perfectly profound little moments like that in real life if you recognize them yourself, do all the fancy shot work and editing in your head, usually in the very seconds that whatever is happening is happening. And even if you do manage to do so, just about never does anyone else you’re with at the time experience that exact same kind of moment, and it’s impossible to explain as it’s happening, and then the moment is over.

Coley and I had to separate to get around a girl who was mostly eclipsed by the size of the poster she was carrying, some sort of project about World War Two—a picture of Hitler doing his mustachioed Sieg heil, a gaunt concentration-camp victim, a couple of American soldiers smoking cigarettes and scowling at the camera, the captions beneath each photo in glitter-bubble letters. If this had been the movie version of my life, I knew, somebody who did teenage stuff well, some director, would have lingered on that poster and maybe even have swelled some sort of poignant music, put us in slow motion as the hallway continued on at regular speed around us, backlit the three of us—Coley and the posterboard chick and me—and in doing so tried to make some statement about teenage frivolity and prom season as it stacked up against something authentic and horrible like war. But if renting all those movies had taught me anything more than how to lose myself in them, it was that you only actually have perfectly profound little moments like that in real life if you recognize them yourself, do all the fancy shot work and editing in your head, usually in the very seconds that whatever is happening is happening. And even if you do manage to do so, just about never does anyone else you’re with at the time experience that exact same kind of moment, and it’s impossible to explain it as it’s happening, and then the moment is over.

When we were first born, Spirit was our predominate guide, but as we ‘matured,’ our society quickly cured us of that. I learned later in my studies that any negative moaning I have about my life is only an affirmation of weakness and makes all those around me not want to be there. Life is nothing more than a dance with God; we just need to follow His lead and quit stepping on His toes. We must be able to release the things we hold dearest in order to truly have. I believe you must know the feeling of hunger before you can truly taste and enjoy food, you can only recognize authenticity by experiencing fraud, and you can only experience true love after enduring heartache. Your level of awareness will increase as you experience the rawness of life on your path to becoming more. God never gives you more than you can handle. He is perfect in His teaching. Know that what comes around goes around, and what you’re unable to forgive and let go will stay around. We need to control what we think, what we say, and how we feel. It’s our thoughts that produce our words, and our words lead to our actions. Our actions over time become habits, which form our character. Our character is what unfolds into our reality. Life is not about a future someone, it’s about ‘becoming’ someone and enjoying every step along the way. There’s no need to wait—significance is available right now. If you had to carry your mental seeds of desired reality around with you, growing to an additional nine pounds concentrated in your belly for nine months, and actually give birth to them, they too would become pretty obvious. The problem with most is they don’t care enough to endure the process, so they wind up aborting their dreams before they have a chance to be born. As you begin to do things to close the gap toward your ideal, you will find that life speeds up. Things quicken, and the closer you get to your goal, the faster it comes for you. The ultimate goal is to condition your body and mind so you can manifest ideals instantly—to think like God thinks. Yearning destroys your ability to have. It’s the carrot dangling just beyond your nose that you will never taste. When you’re obsessed with something you become out of balance and this imbalance creates a barrier between you and what you want. You become too emotionally attached to accept it. We must know the price of our obsessions and refuse to pay it. If Spirit cannot overcome ego and move away from the ways of the world, we will be destined to repeat it. We will die only to perpetuate death. In the beginning of my spiritual quest, I felt left out, alone, and cold. Wandering around in the darkness of my human nature, I came upon a door, and on the door was the word heaven. I knocked on the door but no one answered. I returned back every day, hoping to get someone to hear me and let me in. I became increasingly frustrated, finding myself angrily pounding on the door, but it wouldn’t open. Exhausted, I finally fell to my knees at the foot of the door and prayed, “Please, God, let me in!” The door immediately cracked open. I realized I had been knocking from the inside.

Boys will be boys, and ballplayers will always be arrested adolescents at heart. The proof comes in the mid-afternoon of an early spring training day, when 40 percent of the New York Mets’ starting rotation—Mike Pelfrey and I—hop a chain-link fence to get onto a football field not far from Digital Domain. We have just returned from Dick’s Sporting Goods, where we purchased a football and a tee. We are here to kick field goals. Long field goals. A day before, we were all lying on the grass stretching and guys started talking about football and field-goal kickers, and David Wright mentioned something about the remarkable range of kickers these days. I can kick a fifty-yard field goal, Pelfrey says. You can not, Wright says. You don’t think so? You want to bet? You give me five tries and I’ll put three of them through. One hundred bucks says you can’t, David says. This is going to be the easiest money I ever make. I am Pelf’s self-appointed big brother, always looking out for him, and I don’t want him to go into this wager cold. So I suggest we get a ball and tee and do some practicing. We get back from Dick’s but find the nearby field padlocked, so of course we climb over the fence. At six feet two inches and 220 pounds, I get over without incident, but seeing Pelf hoist his big self over—all six feet seven inches and 250 pounds of him—is much more impressive. Pelf’s job is to kick and my job is to chase. He sets up at the twenty-yard line, tees up the ball, and knocks it through—kicking toe-style, like a latter-day Lou Groza. He backs up to the twenty-five and then the thirty, and boots several more from each distance. Adding the ten yards for the end zone, he’s now hit from forty yards and is finding his range. Pretty darn good. He insists he’s got another ten yards in his leg. He hits from forty-five, and by now he’s probably taken fifteen or seventeen hard kicks and reports that his right shin is getting sore. We don’t consider stopping. Pelf places the ball on the tee at the forty-yard line: a fifty-yard field goal. He takes a half dozen steps back, straight behind the tee, sprints up, and powers his toe into the ball … high … and far … and just barely over the crossbar. That’s all that is required. I thrust both my arms overhead like an NFL referee. He takes three more and converts on a second fifty-yarder. You are the man, Pelf, I say. Adam Vinatieri should worry for his job. That’s it, Pelf says. I can’t even lift my foot anymore. My shin is killing me. We hop back over the fence, Pelf trying to land as lightly as a man his size can land. His shin hurts so much he can barely put pressure on the gas pedal. He’s proven he can hit a fifty-yard field goal, but I go into big-brother mode and tell him I don’t want him kicking any more field goals or stressing his right leg any further. I convince him to drop the bet with David. The last thing you need is to start the season on the DL because you were kicking field goals, I say. Can you imagine if the papers got ahold of that one? The wager just fades away. David doesn’t mind; he gets a laugh at the story of Pelf hopping the fence and practicing, and drilling long ones.

So back in 2010 I had my first sip of what we call the Voicetrax Kool-Aid. I had been told over the years that I had created quite a mixture but never realized I hadn’t drunk it myself. There’s a lot of ingredients in it. Its first ingredient is believing you are enough and also knowing to your very core that you are perfect in your imperfection. It’s letting go and returning to your six year old self who is free and open to all possibility. Who never would overthink things, overanalyze things or worry about being judged. It’s really listening to your inner voice and trusting what it’s telling you…even if what it’s telling you seems scary or impossible. The Kool-Aid tastes like freedom and acceptance and has the sweet taste of authenticity. And the final ingredient is the belief that you can accomplish anything you dream of accomplishing regardless of what anyone has ever told you in the past.

I hold no interest in the tapestry of politics, culture, or religion. I lack the mental aptitude and intellectual capacity to debate nuances of esoteric philosophy and abstract ethical principles. I cannot repose faith in a national ethos that promotes avariciousness, mediocrity, and hedonism. I find no reassurance and emotional wellbeing in adopting religious piety, which requires acceptance and belief of intangible and empirically unprovable concepts and things. It is foolish to squander an earthly life in pursuit of a perfect afterlife, of which there is no evidence. Nor can I endorse suicide because it accomplishes nothing other than terminating a person’s opportunity to meld meaning out of the starkness of existence. I exert no power over external things and gain nothing from resisting fate. I need to accept fate calmly and dispassionately, make productive use of my modest allotment of time, and not waste the spark of existence. I can discover the object of my earnest pursuit only within the flickering self. I am responsible for my actions, which I can examine and control through rigorous exertion of self-discipline.

I used to be afraid that I was hollow somehow, that I only existed if someone could see me and hear me, like a toddler playing peek-a-boo. My whole life was an elaborate attempt at never having to be alone with myself.

Oh sure, I appreciate physical beauty too. I can get excited about the primped and pruned outer shell; I can swoon over bright feathers, striking poses, and perfected prose as much as the next person. But in truth, I much prefer indulging my ethereal sense to those lesser ones – that inner sense that picks up on a deeper and far more exhilarating kind of beauty. That kind of beauty that presents itself slowly, slipping out one layer, one moment, one expression at a time as you really get to know someone. That’s what really gets me going. That’s the only kind that truly satisfies me – the kind of beauty that shines from within. The kind that speaks, not to the eyes, but that reflects back to them after first touching the heart.

Our culture values perfect pictures of ourselves, mirage, over and above authentic connection. But we meet one another through the imperfect particular of our bodies. Imperfection calls out for affinity—for the beloved to say, I too am broken, but may I join you?

And while seeking out the opinions and perspectives of people like ourselves may lead to a more personal and familiar buying experience, what’s even more amazing is the impact those trusted sources have on conversion rates. B2B sales cycle data from Salesforce demonstrates that, when it comes to lead conversion, the interest that originates from customer and employee referrals converts to deals at rates fifty times higher than email campaigns!9 Furthermore, data from marketing automation giant Marketo indicates that leads originating from referrals convert to opportunities at rates of four times the average, and similar to the next three highest-converting lead sources combined (those being partner, inbound, and marketing-generated).10 My personal experience over the years greatly corroborates these statistics. For example, when I started my own sales practice, Cerebral Selling, I needed to have a logo designed. Around the same time, my friend had recently had a nice logo designed for his business. I asked him who he used, he told me, and I just did the same. No further research or investigation required. A short time later, I wanted to head out of town with my wife for an overnight trip to the beautiful Niagara wine region of Ontario to celebrate our anniversary. I didn’t know where to stay or which restaurant to go to, so instead of sifting through pages of online content and reviews, I asked a friend who runs a vineyard in the region. When he gave me his recommendations, I simply booked the places he told me. No questions asked. Were there better places to stay and eat? Potentially. Were there other creative design shops that could have generated equally if not more spectacular logos? More than likely. Do I care? Absolutely not! I love my logo and had a great anniversary outing, and feel secure in my decisions around both because of the feeling I received by selecting recommendations from people I trust. Both experiences are perfect examples of the prescriptive-led sales cycle we spoke about in chapter 2. This means that when it comes to your selling motion, one of the most unobtrusive, empathetic, and authentic ways to convert prospective buyers is simply to surround them with like-minded customers who love you.

Falling in love sometimes feels like tripping over yourself. It’s one of life’s big messy adventures, and one of my greatest joys. Over a lifetime of relationships, I’ve become a connoisseur of its many stages. That deep belly-tickle at discovering rapport with a promising stranger—the hint of recognition, the surge of chemicals. Ooooh, he cute-cute. Then their intoxicating smell, slowly becoming familiar; the whisper of a private nickname as lips brush the ear. The gradual softening into a relationship, as falling in love expands into love, the enduring kind. The body, heart, and psyche are forever changed, and that love stays on in us till we die.

Connection survival style themes to show up in an atmosphere of safety and consent. The use of contracting emphasizes the therapist’s attention, interest, and concern about truly understanding the client. Contracting provides an opportunity to shift old relational patterns of feeling completely alone. This process of intersubjectivity supports a shift away from objectification toward subjectification. Clients are invited to be active collaborators with their therapist, which provides a sense of control over the therapeutic process. Attunement: The contracting process invites clients identified with Attunement survival style themes to check in with and express their needs and feelings. From the very beginning, this process provides an opportunity to shift old relational patterns of feeling that they cannot express their needs and feelings. Contracting helps clients feel seen and heard—by their therapist but also themselves. They are invited, welcomed, and encouraged to reflect on their authentic needs and wishes. Trust: The contracting process gives clients identified with Trust survival style themes the power to set their own course for therapy. The collaborative nature of contracting provides an opportunity to shift old relational patterns where they felt they had to control others in order to feel safe. They are welcomed to modulate their level of openness and vulnerability according to their own sense of comfort and trust. Autonomy: The contracting process encourages clients identified with Autonomy survival style themes to share their authentic Self in an environment of openness, understanding, and respect. Inviting the client to determine their intention and goals for therapy provides an opportunity to shift old relational patterns of having to control against other people’s agendas. Love-Sexuality: The contracting process supports clients identified with Love-Sexuality survival style themes with a sense of not having to be perfect to be accepted and loved. Contracting provides an opportunity to shift old relational patterns where they felt pressure of having to perform and achieve. Clients are welcomed to share from a more open-hearted and intimate place.

On the two kinds of certainty of eternal life. In this life there are two kinds of certainty concerning the life which is eternal: the one consists in those occasions when God tells us of it either himself or through an angel or special revelation, although this happens rarely and only to a few. The other kind of knowledge is better and more beneficial and falls frequently to those whose love is perfect. This happens to those whose love for and intimacy with their God is so great that they trust him completely and are so sure of him that they can no longer have any doubts, their certainty being founded on their love for him in all creatures without distinction. And if all creatures were to reject and abjure him, even if God himself were to do so, then they would not cease to trust, for love is not capable of mistrust but can only trust all that is good. And there is no need for anything to be said to either the lover or the beloved, for as soon as God senses that this person is his friend, he immediately knows all that is good for them and that belongs to their well-being. For however devoted you are to him, you may be sure that he is immeasurably more devoted to you and has incomparably more faith in you. For he is faithfulness itself – of this we can be certain as those who love him are certain. This type of certainty is far greater, more perfect and true than the other and it cannot deceive us, while the first kind can be deceptive and can easily be an illusion. Indeed, the second type is experienced in all the faculties of our soul and cannot deceive those who truly love God; indeed they no more doubt it than they doubt God himself, for love drives out all fear. ‘Love knows no fear’ as St John12 (1 John 4:18) says, and it is also written: ‘Love covers a multitude of sins’ (1 Peter 4:8). For where there is sin, there can be neither complete trust nor love, since love completely covers over sins and knows nothing of them. Not in such a way as if we had not sinned, but rather it wipes them away and drives them out, as if they had never existed. For all God’s works are so utterly perfect and overflowing that whoever he forgives, he forgives totally and absolutely, preferring to forgive big sins rather than little ones, all of which creates perfect trust. I hold this kind of knowledge to be incomparably better, more rewarding and more authentic than the other, since neither sin nor anything else can obstruct it. For when God finds people in the same degree of love, then he judges them in the same way, regardless of whether they have sinned greatly or not at all. But those to whom more is forgiven, should have a greater love, as our Lord Jesus Christ said: ‘They to whom more is forgiven must love more’ (Luke 7:47).

Busting out of your comfort zone might be the most fun thing you ever did — after you get over the idea that you have to be safe, appropriate, perfect, right — or that you have to be anything.

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Increasingly, prominent thinkers in the field of leadership studies like Marcus Buckingham are challenging traditional notions of leadership. Their research suggests that presenting leadership as a list of carefully defined qualities (like strategic, analytical, and performance-oriented) no longer holds. Instead, true leadership stems from individuality that is honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed.4 They believe leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection. This shift is good news for women, who often feel obliged to suppress their emotions in the workplace in an attempt to come across as more stereotypically male. And it’s also good news for men, who may be doing the exact same thing. I

We can spend our lives fretting about our deaths, or we can use our brief time to sink deeper into the experience of being human, for all it entails. The good, the tricky, the impermanent. We can acknowledge our death will one day come and use that knowledge to create a life so whole, so honest, so juicy, that it is worth leaving. I have seen over and over human beings' personal reckonings in the final moments of life. It begs the question: What must I do to be at peace with myself so that I may live presently and die gracefully? Without our deaths, none of it would matter. There would be no context for what we do. When we live in relationship to our mortality, it adds direction to our actions, truth to our words, rapture to our experience, authenticity to our being, and maybe pounds to our hips. We can make choices that resonate with the core of our being, free from societal expectations and the judgment of others. While our lives and choices may seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things, they are not. With the dizzying serendipity that must occur for us to be born, the fact that we live is a miracle.

Nature’s fall There was a theatrical taste to it all, The experiencing of seasons and the morbidness of the fall, When nothing seems to have any sort of animation left, As if everything and everyone is suffering from the trauma of a theft, Where they have been robbed of every lively moment and life’s pleasure, As they were busy indulging in moments of leisure, Unlike nature that only and always grows, And no signs of regression shows, But there is a sort of slight indignation in it all, And you can tell it from every pale leaf falling and tossing against the great wall, The wall that is the only barricade between life and lifelessness, The wall that prevents sensibility from the invasion of senselessness, Where leisure is a moment of enjoyment with one's self and someone you love, It can be a moment in the future or a moment you are experiencing now, But if it indulges with the present to such a degree that it invades the future, Then you are bound to exhaust beforehand life’s true treasure, That of moments of leisure offering life’s authentic pleasure, In quantities with a perfect taste and measure, Because nature too enjoys in summer complete state of leisure, But then spring is for grooming and growing, and not for pleasure, While winter and fall, are for regeneration, A self introspection and kind of inward meditation, But if it spends all seasons in leisure and soaks itself in one feeling alone, that of pleasure, Then it shall be left with no beauty’s treasure, And it shall turn into the desert, where only desert roses grow, And remind you of nature’s follies, its oversights, and its over indulgence in leisure, about which it shall never everything know, Because pleasures have no end, they are a road that has no end, That is why nature created seasons, so that it realised when it was time to bend, And not be left lonely like the desert rose, Who moans the death of beauty lost to nature’s long repose, In the lap of leisure, until it entered a state, Where it was always summer like sunny now, and from this reality it could no longer obviate, Because there was nothing left, to remind it, to end the merriments of summer time, So, it rested in prolonged slumber until the winter robbed it of all its moments sublime, And then, when summer returned and somehow the desert rose bloomed, The nature in this act of callousness was doomed, It was summer always here now, bright light everywhere, Until nature forgot of the desert rose that still bloomed somewhere, And then it all ended and the beauty got buried under the sands of time, And it became the nature’s most infamous crime, To have relied only on summer joys and thinking they will last forever, And when fall took over; the summer and the spring, now returned never!

It can be hard. It can be awkward. It’s really important to know that actually, especially for men, you don’t have to be perfect and you don’t have to know all the answers and you don’t have to know all the questions and you don’t have to have the perfect relationship yourself. But that in having these conversations with your son over time, you’re building a better relationship and you’re building a more authentic relationship between the two of you, in addition to everything else, which is what you hope to have when he is an adult so that you have that relationship where you can talk to one another, the kind of relationship that you wish you could have with men in your lives.

The truth is that contentment is an inside job. So is authenticity. Validation doesn't come from magazines, blogs, Facebook feeds, or even your best friends. It doesn't come from looking like you have it all together online. It's easy to spend our time trying to manufacture the visuals of contentment, or longing for the images of happiness that permeate social media. It's harder, but more rewarding, to dig into our own lives to do the work... ...That's what raging against the minivan has come to mean to me. It's the quiet rebellion against obsessing over the optics and outcomes of motherhood...

True leadership stems from individuality that is honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed. They believe leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection.

Perhaps the Christmas spirit is a loving reminder that we must make time for the long, slow journey across the desert; we must take time to discover our star; we must honor the time necessary to brood over the coming of the authentic women we were created by Love to become. It has been said many times that our lives are gifts from God—that what we do with them is our gift in return. Today is the perfect day to remember this.

Choosing authenticity is not an easy choice. E. E. Cummings wrote, “To be nobody-but-yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself—means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight—and never stop fighting.” “Staying real” is one of the most courageous battles that we’ll ever fight. When we choose to be true to ourselves, the people around us will struggle to make sense of how and why we are changing. Partners and children might feel fearful and unsure about the changes they’re seeing. Friends and family may worry about how our authenticity practice will affect them and our relationships with them. Some will find inspiration in our new commitment; others may perceive that we’re changing too much—maybe even abandoning them or holding up an uncomfortable mirror. It’s not so much the act of authenticity that challenges the status quo—I think of it as the audacity of authenticity. Most of us have shame triggers around being perceived as self-indulgent or self-focused. We don’t want our authenticity to be perceived as selfish or narcissistic. When I first started mindfully practicing authenticity and worthiness, I felt like every day was a walk through a gauntlet of gremlins. Their voices can be loud and unrelenting: “What if I think I’m enough, but others don’t?” “What if I let my imperfect self be seen and known, and nobody likes what they see?” “What if my friends/family/co-workers like the perfect me better … you know, the one who takes care of everything and everyone?” Sometimes, when we push the system, it pushes back. The pushback can be everything from eye rolls and whispers to relationship struggles and feelings of isolation. There can also be cruel and shaming responses to our authentic voices. In my research on authenticity and shame, I found that speaking out is a major shame trigger for women. Here’s how the research participants described the struggle to be authentic: Don’t make people feel uncomfortable but be honest. Don’t upset anyone or hurt anyone’s feelings but say what’s on your mind. Sound informed and educated but not like a know-it-all. Don’t say anything unpopular or controversial but have the courage to disagree with the crowd. I also found that men and women struggle when their opinions, feelings, and beliefs conflict with our culture’s gender expectations. For example, research on the attributes that we associate with “being feminine” tells us that some of the most important qualities for women are thin, nice, and modest.1 That means if women want to play it totally safe, we have to be willing to stay as small, quiet, and attractive as possible. When looking at the attributes associated with masculinity, the researchers identified these as important attributes for men: emotional control, primacy of work, control over women, and pursuit of status.2 That means if men want to play it safe, they need to stop feeling, start earning, and give up on meaningful connection.

（温莎大学毕业证成绩单咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

（McGill麦吉尔大学毕业证咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

诺瓦艺术与设计大学毕业证书咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

（办理卡莫森学院毕业证咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

滑铁卢大学毕业证成绩单咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

纽约理工学院毕业证成绩单咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

美国普林斯顿大学毕业证书原版制作咨询顾问qq/微信: 1954 292 140）回国认证、应付家人、回国工作入职、国外申请学校等。致力于为每一位因特殊因素拿不到学位证的同学服务。Over the past ten years, the study abroad service company has countless overseas models, and can perfectly restore the degree, Diploma, Transcripts, certificate and other graduation materials of overseas universities in 1:1. ◇高规格，高质量！选择我们-就是选择安心，全程保密，让你办的放心。 ◇留学学历认证，非正常毕业留学生。留信网认证。 ◇服务: 留学学历认证, 未毕业 原版毕业证, 留学保录取。 No matter where you are, as long as you need it, we will meet your needs with the most efficient work efficiency Just a little hope that everyone understands! This is a gray industry with its special nature. I am doing this for everyone, and I have a heavy legal responsibility. Some friends consulted for a long time, and finally asked, "If I am looking for you, how can you prove that you are not deceiving?" "If I am looking for you to prove how your things are reliable?" "How to prove that you are good people?" Since we have chosen us, we should trust us and buy goods to shop around. I have no problems at all. I have never urged my clients to handle it with me, and I never object to customers consulting more. After all, who is the best, I believe everyone sees it. Wherever gold shines! Business Selection Guidelines 1. the work has not been determined to return to the country to first see the parents, relatives and friends to see the diploma. You can apply for a diploma for your school. 2. returning to the country to enter private enterprises, foreign companies, their own business situation These units do not query the authenticity of the graduation certificate and there is no channel in the country to inquire about the authenticity of the foreign diploma does not need to provide real education department certification. In view of this, you can apply for a diploma; 3. into the state-owned enterprises, institutions, civil servants, etc. These units are required to provide real Ministry of Education certification for the Ministry of Education certification required for a large number of materials and cumbersome all materials you must provide the original we rely on rich experience and fast green channel to help you Quickly integrate materials to make you less detours.

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[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Building Insurance Your Guide" by michael a.n.p. cretikos.] ________________________________________ 5 out of 5 stars ________________________________________ Share This Review FacebookTwitterLinkedInPinterestShare ________________________________________ Building Insurance: How to Select the Correct Building Sum Insured Value for Low-Rise and High-Rise Structures authored by Michael A. N. P. Cretikos is a comprehensive guide on how to select the best policy and factors to consider to avoid being in a situation of underinsurance. According to the author, he filled in the gap that exists in knowledge by introducing the Building Sum Insured Value (BSI) based on current rental value, and according to him, this method is the most accurate that there is. The author highlighted situations in which underinsurance is inevitable and underlined ways to avoid such situations. Taxes such as stamp duties on insurance could be disincentives, and the author discouraged it. He advised the readers to always opt for 100% coverage so that the loss can be fully catered for and the insured reinstated back to their previous position. Several acts and policies were stated, and the authors made suggestions for innovations; the ICA code wasn’t left out; he highlighted the fault in it and gave feasible solutions. This book was very informative, and I enjoyed reading it. The author's in-depth research shines through and adds a layer of authenticity to the book. I loved the fact that as much as the author criticized the already existing policies, he made suggestions for improvement. I equally appreciated the fact that there were so many quotations backed up with references so the readers can verify at their will. The step-by-step calculations and clearly outlined tables also enhanced my understanding of how numerical values are arrived at, and I absolutely loved it. As much as I enjoyed reading this book, I found some parts overly repetitive, and I also found the consistent use of bold texts quite distracting. I loved the keypoints outlined in every section; it made the important information very easy to grasp. Overall, this book was an enlightening read and would keep readers eager to learn more. I rate this book five out of five stars because of its informative contents and the fact that my dislikes weren’t enough to remove a star. I didn't find any errors while reading, which implies that the book was perfectly edited. I’d recommend this book to people who are interested in the workings of building insurance.