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In my experience, the process of being masculinized, the process of becoming a man, was based on three practices: the practice of violence, the endurance of physical pain, and the violation of consent. As a preteen, you were supposed to punch each other at random. You were supposed to point your airsoft gun at someone else and ask, βCan I shoot you?β; when they said no, you were supposed to do it anyway. You were supposed to learn to never say no, and you were supposed to punish people when they did say no. You were supposed to stigmatize and victimize weakness.
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Jacob Tobia (Sissy: A Coming-of-Gender Story)
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The boys organized air-soft gun wars, so eight sweaty, stinky boys are running through my house wielding semiautomatic pellet guns dressed in sweatshirts though it was 97 degrees yesterday. My rule on this boy business: βDonβt cry if you get pinged, and if one stray pellet hits me, I will run over your guns with my car.β This is life with sons, people.
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Jen Hatmaker (7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess)
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