Abuse By Proxy Quotes

The term 'flying monkey' is called 'abuse by proxy.' The flying monkeys do the bidding for a narcissist. The term flying monkey was coined in the movie The Wizard of Oz. The flying monkeys were under the wicked witches spell to gang up on poor Dorothy and her friends.

This is the history of governments, - one man does something which is to bind another. A man who cannot be acquainted with me, taxes me; looking from afar at me, ordains that a part of my labour shall go to this or that whimsical end, not as I, but as he happens to fancy. Behold the consequence. Of all debts, men are least willing to pay the taxes. What a satire is this on government! Everywhere they think they get their money's worth, except for these. Hence, the less government we have, the better, - the fewer laws, and the less confided power. The antidote to this abuse of formal Government, is, the influence of private character, the growth of the Individual; the appearance of the principal to supersede the proxy; the appearance of the wise man, of whom the existing government, is, it must be owned, but a shabby imitation. That which all things tend to educe, which freedom, cultivation, intercourse, revolutions, go to form and deliver, is character; that is the end of nature, to reach unto this coronation of her king. To educate the wise man, the State exists; and with the appearance of the wise man, the State expires. The appearance of character makes the State unnecessary. The wise man is the State. He needs no army, fort, or navy, - he loves men too well; no bribe, or feast, or palace, to draw friends to him; no vantage ground, no favourable circumstance. He needs no library, for he has not done thinking; no church, for he is a prophet; no statute book, for he has the lawgiver; no money, for he is value; no road, for he is at home where he is; no experience, for the life of the creator shoots through him, and looks from his eyes. He has no personal friends, for he who has the spell to draw the prayer and piety of all men unto him, needs not husband and educate a few, to share with him a select and poetic life. His relation to men is angelic; his memory is myrrh to them; his presence, frankincense and flowers.

have termed this process “gaslighting by proxy.” Keep in mind that this is the selfish need of the stakeholders around the narcissist (who may have had a hand in creating the narcissist) to not have to face the situation for what it is, or who are simply relieved that someone else is taking the abuse, and they want you to remain in your role as proverbial punching bag.

In some ways this can feel like being revictimized, as though you are as toxic as your abuser because you won’t just hurry up and heal. I have termed this process “gaslighting by proxy.” Keep in mind that this is the selfish need of the stakeholders around the narcissist (who may have had a hand in creating the narcissist) to not have to face the situation for what it is, or who are simply relieved that someone else is taking the abuse, and they want you to remain in your role as proverbial punching bag.

A career in advocacy. In awareness. In positive change. My nightmares are being replaced with aspirational daydreams of starting my own organization, spreading knowledge and awareness about Munchausen by proxy, and mentoring others who have experienced trauma and abuse.

The notoriety added a dimension to her disease. Yes, the Munchausen by proxy was the most dangerous part of the abuse, but it also acted as a backstage pass to my mother’s internal cinematic show. Whatever that movie in her mind was, I wasn’t the star of it. When the press arrived, she’d be doing all of the talking, while I numbly waited for my cue. Like a stage mother, Beauty Queen Dee Dee fed me my lines: “It’s a dream come true,” “This makes me so happy,” “My mom is my best friend.” Through me and through the script we memorized, Dee Dee could achieve some level of the fame she had long desired.

If her love took on the contours of patriarchy and white supremacy, if her love was violent or brutal, so was the world in which she was trying to help me survive... still, I understand how abuse and violence can turn into grotesque proxies for love.

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