“
am not the coolest kid in my class, nor am I in the top sixteen. I am dead last. Not only am I dead last in my class, but there are fourth graders that would probably rank higher than me. I’m like the crumbs at the bottom of a potato chip bag. While they should be treated the same as the big ones, they are often tossed away with the bag and discarded. What I find so ironic and hilarious is that these classmates of mine that think they are so much better than me are huge dorks and dweebs themselves in the eyes of the pubbies. When it comes to the hierarchy of the kids in this town, public always wins. Even the runts of the public school crowd rank higher than the coolest of us cathies (that's their unfortunate nickname for us). It makes for a very interesting culture on the shared bus system. Take for instance, Josh Baker. He is pretty much the it guy in the St. Guadalupe’s 5th grade. I know of at least three girls in my class that would shave her head to go out with him (whatever "going out" means to a 5th-grader). All of the other seven boys in the class fight to have him at their sleepovers, parties and picnics. Josh is pretty much on a seven-weekend rotation with these kids. In this little world of ours, we have our kings and queens. Josh is our grade’s king. But as soon as any of us step outside of our parochial world, we become losers to the public crowd. Josh, for instance, tells anyone in our class what to do. If he needs his lunch fetched for him, he has a handful of numbskulls to do his bidding. If he forgets his homework, he only needs to say the words “yeah, so last night…” before receiving a copy of the answers. People are always ready and willing to help him because he is what everyone aspires to be or be around.
”
”
Penn Brooks (A Diary of a Private School Kid (A Diary of a Private School Kid, #1))